Today was the third day after I had squeezed Louis’ hand. I was now ‘up and running’ and by that I mean I could sit up in my bed. After the doctor had walked into my room they instantly took me to the X-rays and I got a scan of my head. It turned out that my head had healed completely and that during the time I was in the coma my body had healed successfully. I was still stuck in the hospital, since all I really cold do was sit, but Louis was with me every day. I had tried to talk to him about the things that happened when I got to his and Harrys flat but he keeps on avoiding the subject and I hated that. I still hadn’t asked them about what happened to Michael’s baby but decided that today was the day I would.

I was currently lying down on my hospital bed and was supposed to be asleep. My thoughts however kept me up, I just couldn’t stop thinking about what has happened. I desperately wanted to talk the doctor but he hasn’t come in here today. But I was actually feeling a little lucky today and just when Harry, who was with me at the moment, left the room to go get some coffee, a nurse entered the room.

“How are you feeling today Miss?” I smiled and nodded my head as I spoke.

“I’m feeling good. I was wondering if I could talk to the doctor by any chance?” She smiled and nodded.

“Of course. I’m just going to check you vitals and then I’ll fetch him for you.” I nodded and waited for her to finish. When she walked out of room Harry came back and I cursed on the inside.

“Did she say anything special?” I shrugged and looked at my hands.

“Nah, she checked my vitals. But she was going to get the doctor now.” I looked up at him and he looked frightened.

“Why? Are you alright?” I laughed when he walked up to me and touched my face. I swatted his hand away and rolled my eyes at him.

“I want to talk to him. I have a few questions and none of you guys want to answer them.” I shrugged again and looked towards the door.

“Johanna… We just don’t want-…”

“Me to stress out, I get it. I just need to know.” I paused a little and looked up at him. My eyes were sad and so were his. “I need to know what my life is going to look like. No matter what happens I will stay with Louis, I just hope he’s going to see that soon.” Harry sighed as I looked away from him again.

“He’s not afraid that you’ll leave, he’s afraid that someone else will take you from him.” I looked up at him quickly and became angry.

“And that’s another thing he won’t tell me. What happened to Michael? I don’t care about him, but I don’t feel safe Harry.” I took a shaky breath before continuing. “I have a feeling that he is going to walk through that door. Every time it opens I’m scared.” I looked at my hands and felt the same fear re-appear.

“Look, I’ll talk to him okay?” He squeezed my hand and I nodded. Just as he was about to say something more the doctor walked into the room. “I’ll go call him now.” He let go of my hand and walked past the doctor. Before he walked out the door he turned back to me and gave me a comforting smile. It helped me a little but I was still afraid of what the doctor might say. Harry disappeared out the door and I turned towards the doctor. He smiled slightly and I returned the smile.

“The nurse told me you wanted to speak to me?” He sat down on the chair next to my bed and I nodded.

“I’ve been talking to my friends and asking them questions…” I shook my head as I looked at my hands. I saw that doctor nod his head before he spoke.

“And what might these questions be?” I thought about it for a few minutes and then took a deep breath before speaking.

“The baby. Is it still… Am I still…” I couldn’t finish a sentence and he noticed that. He placed a hand on my arm to comfort me and then he took a deep breath.

“You were in such a critical state when you first arrived at the hospital that the first thing we had to focus on was you. The baby was secondary to your wellbeing and when we later did an ultrasound…” His words slowed down and he looked down at his clipboard. “The baby didn’t have a heartbeat. We had to operate at once and it was much worse than we thought. Your uterus was severally raptured and the baby was…” He looked like he was searching for the right words. I cleared my throat and looked him dead in the eye.

“The baby was what?” My voice wavered a little bit but I truly wanted to know.

“It was something we only see in cases where the women have been physically abused. The baby was crushed and there was no way to save it.” I looked down at my hands and took a deep breath before looking up at the doctor again.

“So I lost it?” I tried not to sound too hopeful but I don’t think I succeeded. He looked at me with a tilted head and sighed as he stood up.

“Yes, you lost it. You can still have kids in the future but please wait at least a year before trying.” I nodded and he walked over to me again. “I’m sorry for your lost.” I looked up at him confused and then realized a human life was lost. Swallowing back the sassy comment I had on my tongue I looked down at my hands and sighed.

“Thank you doc.” I didn’t need to say anything else because his pager beeped and he excused himself. Not too long after he left Harry came into the room again. Before he could utter a word I cleared my throat and spoke.

“Did you call Louis?” He nodded his head but didn’t say anything. “What did you say to him?” He stayed quiet for a few seconds before sitting down in the chair and looking at me with tired eyes.

“I don’t want to be between you guys in this. You know as well as I do that if I would’ve told him the truth he wouldn’t come. So I lied for you and told him you just wanted to see him.” Which is correct too, I thought as I looked down at my hands once more.

“I’m sorry Harry. I didn’t mean to put you in a tricky situation.” He sighed softly and I saw him shake his head. He whispered something that sounded like ‘you do by being with him’ but I wasn’t sure I heard right. After he was finished muttering to himself he sat up straight and looked straight at me.

“He’ll be here in twenty minutes or so.” I nodded and Harry stood up. I quickly grabbed his arm and he turned back to look at me.

“Thank you. For everything.” He shook his head and looked down at the floor. “No I mean it Harry. I’m really thankful to have all of you guys in my life. I’m not sure what I would do without you.” I took a deep breath and went with what my gut was telling me. “I have the feeling you don’t want to hear this but you really are like a brother to me. I trust you with my life.” He looked up at me and gave me a weak smile when I said the first part. He shrugged and grabbed my hand, holding it between both of his.

“I guess you can’t have everything.” I smiled and shook my head. “I’m just glad you’re okay.” He leaned forward and kissed my cheek before leaving the room. I didn’t ask him where he was going but I had the feeling that he was more hurt than he showed. I’m not saying that because I know I’m all that, but because I have gotten to know him and I can tell when he fakes a smile.

To past the time I decided to read a magazine Perrie left me the other day when she was here. It was a gossip magazine, and a page had been marked up. I looked at it curiously and when I opened the magazine to that page my mouth fell open and I stared at a picture of myself and Louis. The first thing I did was to check if the photo was okay, which it kind of was. You couldn’t really see the injuries in the large photo, there were several. The second thing I noticed was the headline of the ‘story’.

LOUIS TOMLINSON’S NEW GIRLFRIEND?

My mouth was gaping at those words too. Even though I was comfortable to be called his girlfriend, it was only with close friends. I was so afraid that Michael would see this and become mad. I felt a little flutter in my stomach as I kept on reading the article and the smile on my face only grew by every word.

Long have we been worried about our Louis Tomlinson when he and ex-girlfriend Eleanor Calder broke up almost a year ago. We say Mr Tomlinson out drinking, looking rather broken even though sources told us that it was in fact he who broke up with her. And then when the boys came home from their small American tour that lasted for three months he suddenly seemed like he was floating on clouds. We of course asked ourselves what could’ve brought on this change in attitude. Could it be that Elounor was back together? Or was it someone new? We searched and searched for signs of a new girl in Louis’ life but nothing came up. And then in December he was seen taking a ride on the London Eye with a rather unconventional girl. She didn’t look at all like the very slim Eleanor Calder but she sure brought a warm smile to Louis face. The couple was seen together several times after that and it was confirmed by a close friend that they were rather serious. The girl had been living with Louis and Harry since the beginning of August and the source told us that they couldn’t stay away from each other. Was it love at first sight? We now know that it was no coincident that Louis broke up with Eleanor at the same time as the girl moved in with them.

But what happened to the adorable couple? No one knows, and no close friends are willing to spill the beans about this story. All we know is that at Louis birthday party the girl made a sweet speech and then disappeared from the party. Since then they haven’t been seen together and she moved out instantly, now living somewhere in London.

And yesterday Louis was spotted with this mysterious girl once more, after a six month gap. Reports tell us that two hours after the couple arrived at the boys flat an ambulance came and got a limp woman body and a very flustered looking Louis.
What conclusions can we make after this? Well not much, but we and all the Directioners out there hope that the wondercouple is back together. Oh, and if you are; We want to know her name Louis!

The article wasn’t fancy or anything but it felt good to know that the papers and the Directioners were behind us, if there even was an us. I know I shouldn’t doubt Louis, he has done everything for me, but we haven’t talked about it at all and I just wasn’t sure. I finished reading it and then suddenly I heard a knock by the door. When I looked up I saw Louis standing there, leaning against the doorframe and looking at me with a warm smile. I couldn’t help but return the smile.

“Hi.” He said simply and still not moving from his spot.

“Hello.” I blushed and looked away from him quickly. I didn’t know why but the months apart made me feel like I was a little school girl again.

“Can I come in?” I nodded and he walked towards me. He sat down beside me on the bed and picked up the magazine from my lap. “Have you read the whole thing?” I nodded once more and he looked thoughtful.

“Is that a good one or are all the magazines as supportive?” I laughed a little and looked at him as I waited for his answer. He shrugged and looked down at the photos in the magazine.

“Most of them are good.” He nodded when he spoke those words but I saw his face darken when he began speaking the next ones. “But some are just hateful.” I sighed and looked down at my hands.

“You realize I need to read those to right?” I looked up at him and he looked at me with a surprised face. “You didn’t think I would realize you told Perrie to give me that?” He slowly shook his head as his cheeks grew darker. “You’re the only one who thinks I need to be protected, Lou.” I stared at him and shook my head.

“I think that’s for me to decide.” I laughed an almost evil laugh and looked at him with mock on my eyes.

“But it’s not. I’m a grownup Louis. And you’re not my father.” He looked down at his hands and then back up at me. He looked so sad and I desperately wanted to make him happy again.

“I know why you told Harry to call me.” Now it was my turn to stare at him in shock and surprise and he just kept going. “I know you want to know a bunch of things I’ve kept from you for the last few days.” He took a deep breath. “You talked to the doctor?” I nodded and felt a smile break out on my face.

“I’m not pregnant with his child anymore.” A single tear slid down my cheek as Louis leaned forward and pulled me into a hug. He held me close for a few minutes before leaning back and leaving me cold. He sat quiet for a few minutes before running a frustrated hand through his hair.

“Just ask me the question you want to ask Jo.” He looked at me and waited for me to answer. I took a deep breath before looking at my hands as I spoke.

“Michael. Where is he?”

“We don’t know.” I swallowed back the fear before speaking again.

“And Robbie?” I saw his jaw clench and unclench.

“He got fired. They think that they have enough to put him away for a few years…” He shrugged and looked at the floor.

“He didn’t tell you anything about Michael?” Louis shook his head and then looked up at me. I’m sure all he saw was pure fear but he thought that fear was for my own life. It wasn’t. Louis had gone against Michael and now I was afraid that Michael was going to kill him. I could not survive without my love.

“Everything will be okay. You will have bodyguards and police escorts everywhere you go until they catch him.” I had been looking at my hands but now my gaze snapped up to him.

“You need it too.” He smiled a crooked smile and grabbed my hand.

“I’m never leaving your side again.” I blushed and smiled at his words. I pulled on his hand a little to make him lean forward and our lips soon connected in a sweet but short kiss. When he leaned back I had a smiled imprinted on my lips.

“So…” He looked at me with a warm smile and I felt my insides melt. “Do you know when I get to go home?” At first he looked concerned and then I realized he was thinking I meant the apartment I lived in with Michael. “I meant home with you.” A smile broke on his face and he half nodded and half shook his head.

“They’re not sure yet. It might be in a week or so, if you keep on improving.” I nodded and motioned to Louis that I wanted to lie down. He helped me and then laid down in front of me. I smiled as he kissed the tip of my nose and then my cheek.

“You know I love you right?” He smiled but didn’t nod. “Louis. I really do love you. Never once in my life have I been this sure about something. I’m still afraid for your safety but I realized that I can’t function without you. You’re like air to me. And for the last six months I haven’t been breathing at all.” I took a shaky breath and felt his lips on mine instantly. When he leaned back a little I smiled and closed my eyes to just enjoy the closeness of him. “I’m in this for the long run. I am not leaving this time.”

Notes

Just wanna give you guys a heads up! There is only one chapter left and then this story is up to speed with the same one on Mibba! It will take longer to update then!
Love you all! <3