My Light

Nora's POV

Christmas time is always a mess for a florist. We have what seems like thousands of plants littered all over the store, people rushing in for last minute bouquets, balloons, and God knows what else they think of. My feet literally ache for weeks, even well after Christmas. Christmas and wedding season are literally the worst on my back and feet.

I love New York this time of year though. The sights, the sounds, it seems like the smell of stale piss gives way to holiday cheer for just a few weeks. When it's finally time for me to go home, the moon is shinning bright and the sky is lit up with Christmas lights.

When I arrive closer to my apartment building I notice the street is lit up with different lights. Red and blue ones. Red ones. I stand shocked first and clutch my heart, preparing my body and emotions for the worst. If I lost my Nonna today I think I would die, I'm not prepared for it. Not one bit.

When I get closer I can hear my mama's voice, yelling. I take off in that direction, dodging people left and right when I finally get up to the small crowd of people and see Nonna being loaded into the back of the ambulance. I push through the crowd, yelling for my mom, I see she's frantic.

“Mama! What is going on?” I ask her, my mouth dry from the running, I need to work out more.

“Nora! Oh God Nora.” She grasps my shoulder, I can see she's been crying, her eyes bloodshot and puffy.

“What's happening?” I ask again, searching behind her for answers.

“Mama, Mama.” She stammers. “I came home after work and fell asleep, when I woke up she was missing. I searched all over the apartment, I went to the roof and wasn't there, I asked all the residents, looked in the basement. I couldn't find her.” My heart drops as she runs her fingers through her hair and clasps her hands around her mouth.

“Why didn't you call me?” I demand, the crowd around us has started to lessen, people continuing on with their journey as they now have a new story to tell at the dinner table. I'm obvious concerned for Nonna, but I'm even more pissed at my mom right now. It's December in New York, it's not exactly warm.

“I was looking for her!” She's upset as well, I know she's still frantic. “I ran up and down the block, I was calling all of her friends, I called the police. I'm sorry that you weren't my first phone call Nora. Life isn't always about you.” She points her finger in my chest and I'm taken a back. I know sometimes we let our emotions get the best of us but sometimes I just don't understand where her aggression comes from.

“Does Uncle Sal know?” I ask, now timid to provoke her.

“No, but you know he'll find out.” She wipes tears away from her face.

“What happens when he does?” I tighten my coat, the wind whipping through the buildings.

“You know what will happen Nora. This has happened before, they'll take her away.” She shrugs and my heart just falls. I know we're both not prepared for this. It's a realization of the disease. When you get diagnosed there is a time of denial. I mean, yeah her mental state has been deteriorating but you just keep pushing it back, thinking she's just having a bad day or that she's just tired. But then the bad days out weigh the good days. Every day is a struggle. You're constantly thinking of them and what they're doing, hoping and praying that you don't wake up and they don't remember you anymore. My heart will just split in two when I see the day that my Nonna won't remember me anymore.

“Where did they find her?” I ask.

“Just a few blocks down. The grocery clerk called the police, she was walking around with no coat, a thin shirt. Said that she couldn't remember how to get home. They're taking her in to make sure she's okay.” She rubs my upper arm briefly. “Lets go meet her at the hospital then.”

“You're never here Salvatore! You have no idea what it takes to care for her!” I bite my lip, they're full on having an argument in the hospital waiting room. Nonna is sleeping in her room, on an IV drip for dehydration. Other then that she's just fine. This is the third time she's left the apartment without anyone knowing. However, the other two times were in the summer so it was warmer, and she was only gone for less then a half hour. She always remembered where she came from. This time was different. She was gone for hours and from chatting with her, she has no idea what has happened. It's the realization of the progress of this disease. And I don't like it.

“Obviously you can't handle her anymore. She needs to be moved to a facility.” He demands. I take a deep breath and walk into the waiting room. Ysabella is in the corner, chatting on her phone. I can only assume she's calling around to places to try and find room for Nonna. The last thing I need. My mom is standing just a foot away from Salvatore, her new confidence is really striking a chord with me, I admire her strength. And then Salvatore, dressed still in his business suit, pacing back and forth.

“She's fine.” My mom grits her teeth, her hair a little wild and crazy.

“You and Nora can't handle her. This is enough. We let you mess around and play caretaker but we both know that you struggle with that, I mean, look at Nora, you could never even move out. You always needed someone else's help.” He snides and tosses his head back just a little bit.

“Excuse me!” I interject. “Don't speak to my mother that way.” I set my cup down for fear that my emotions would get the best of me and I'd splash the hot coffee in his face.

“Oh shut up. I'm not going to sit here and listen to a twenty five year old whose had everything handed to her on a silver platter. You still live in that apartment, you're taking over the flower shop. You've never tried for anything.” He furrows his brows at me and fury just takes over my body. “Ysabella is on the phone with facilities right now. I've got friends in the court systems that will burry you in paperwork if you try and fight this. She's going to a facility.” He literally stomps his foot to make a point and I'm yet again reminded as to why I hate him and everything he stands for.

“Are you ever going to see her?” I ask, crossing my arms. I know the answer to this, he'll say he will but he never does.

“That's my business. Why don't you focus on yourself and your future?”

“Don't speak to my daughter like that.” I watch as my mom takes a step forward to be right in Salvatore's face.

“I'll speak to whom ever I want however I want. Shes going in a facility and you don't have enough money to fight me on this. If you do, I'll drag you through the mud in court Angela.” His face inches closer to hers in threat. I feel like this whole waiting room is under tension, you can literally feel it in the room.

“Mama.” I put my arm out as she almost jumps with my touch. I just want everyone to take a step back. She looks at me and I see out of the corner of my eye that Salvatore hasn't moved. His face is filled with tension, the veins in his neck are literally popping out of his skin.

“Make your choice wisely Angela. You might live to regret it.” His voice is sing songy, literally sending chills up and down my body. He turns on his toes and walks back to Ysabella.

“We're going to lose her.” My mom whispers to me and I can see all the pain on her face.

“Don't say that.” I know my face too is filled with pain and concern.

“It's happening. She's getting worse by the day, she's not remembering the simple things. We can't afford for him to take us to court. He's powerful Nora. He will drag us to the ground and he won't quit.” She sits on the ugly patterned chair and rests her face in her hands. “I just can't do this anymore.” He bottom lip is quivering, it's taken years for her to admit this.

“It's okay mom. Everything will be fine.” I reassure her as I wrap my arm around her for a hug. “Everything will be fine.” I tell her again. I can't tell if it's me actually meaning it or if it's just me trying to convince myself that everything will in fact be fine.

Notes

Feel like it's been so long since I update! So sorry for the delay! Sadly this is my last pre-written chapter so I really need to get on this whole writing train. :) Hopefully I can update on Monday! It's been difficult to write when things are heavy in this story right now, hopefully you're thinking of the good times in the story!

Thank you all so much for sticking with me and continuing to read. Welcome to all the new readers, thanks for stopping by! Hopefully you all have a great day!

xoxox