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My Judgement's Clouded

We can start all over again

The next morning when I woke up everything felt right. I wasn’t feeling that awful feeling that told me that I had to make a decision. It all felt right. I had arms around me that made me feel safe and the person holding me was the most wonderful person in the world. Liam was safe. Even though I have been scared and even though all I wanted was for him to disappear I am truly glad he didn’t. I wouldn’t be able to do this without him. I knew that our future wasn’t going to be easy. He being who he was and me not being as important to the world as he was. There were still things that needed to be fixed but it felt like nothing could hurt me.

I felt his body move next to mine and his arms tightened around my body. When I heard him groan I turned around and he hid his face on my shoulder. I laughed slightly and poked his cheek to make him look at me.

“Liam…” I whispered his name softly and I felt him shiver. “Wake up.” He groaned again and then spoke into my shoulder.

“I don’t want to. It’s so bright!” I laughed at his statement and nudged him with the shoulder he was laying on.

“Come on!” I leaned my head a little closer to his and spoke with the most sensual voice I could manage. “You can’t stay in bed all day.” Those words made him look up at me and his eyes looked black. He looked at me with passion in his eyes and I smiled sweetly. He took that as some sort of queue and leaned in to press his lips against mine. I wasn’t going to complain but I was sure I had morning breath.

The kiss started out very innocent and then slowly it became more heated. He licked my bottom lip, asking for entrance and in the heat of the moment I gave in. His tongue was gently pushed into my mouth, meeting my very waiting tongue. They danced together like the fireflies at night. It was wonderful and I felt myself get more and more excited downstairs. When I felt Liams hand reach under my shirt I understood that he was getting excited too. As soon as his hand reached my breast I quickly pushed him back and broke the kiss. He stared at me with shocked eyes. After a few seconds he blushed and started mumbling apologies. He sat up and placed his head in his hands. I sighed and sat up next too him.

“Liam…” I sighed again and Liam kept his head in his hands. “Liam, listen. You didn’t do anything wrong.” He let out a weal laugh and shook his head.

“I pushed you too soon. I am so sorry.” He sounded so disappointed in himself that I just got mad. I raised my voice when I spoke and I got up from the bed at the same time.

“Could you stop it? I am not a bloody doll!” He looked up at me and I stood at the side of the bed. “Look I get it, I’ve pushed you away so many times that you think that I am going to do it again. But that’s where you’re wrong.” He put his head in his hands again and I grabbed a pillow and threw it at him. He looked up at me in shock and open mouth. “Listen to me!”

“I am listening! Of course I am afraid that I will loose you. I want you and you made it very clear when I came to you house that you didn’t want me.” I gasped at his words and had to remind myself that he was only saying this because he was hurt.

“Are you serious? I thought you understood!” He was about to speak but I put my hand up and continued. “And just so you know, I don’t want to sleep with you right now because the last time I slept with someone, that someone being you, I screwed everything up. And if I was to have sex with you now, there is a constant reminder of how idiotic I really am.” He sighed and sat on the side of the bed. I backed up a little so that there was some space between us.

“You were not an idiot. You were drunk, that’s two different things.” I wasn’t going to start a conversation about the fact that I thought every person should take responsibility, no matter how sober or drunk that person may have been. The room was silent after Liams words. He waited for my response and I thought about what I was going to say. I caressed my belly where my little girl was now kicking. She didn’t like the fact that we were slightly fighting.

“I really want you Liam.” He looked up at me with tired eyes and I felt tears starting to form in mine. “All of you. I just can’t right now.” I went over to him and sat on my knees in front of him. I took his hands in mine and looked him deeply in his eyes. “Since I don’t remember anything I want our real first time to be special. I want to be able to give you everything you deserve and I want to be me.” I wasn’t saying that the person I was now wasn’t me but I wanted to be the ME that he had met six months ago. He looked at me and I saw his expression soften. He understood.

“I do understand, Rosie. And I am sorry for pushing you.” I shook my head and leaned in to press my lips against his.

“There is nothing to be sorry about. We are both going to make some mistakes in this relationship and it’s not going to be perfect.” He raised his eyebrow and I smiled.

“Well I’m not sure I signed up for imperfect.” I laughed and shook my head.

“Really? You met me and thought ‘this relationship will be perfect’? Sorry, but I am in fact a girl and I do PMS at least one week a month!” He smiled at me and squeezed my hands.

“Isn’t that supposed to go away when you’re pregnant?” I laughed out loud and stood up, with help from Liam. I turned my back to him and walked out of the bedroom, still laughing. I heard him get up out of bed and follow me into the kitchen. “What’s so funny?” He looked at me with curious eyes and I couldn’t help but laugh more. He stayed there quiet and just waited until I could collect myself and speak.

“It’s funny because a pregnant woman is PMS:ing four out of four weeks.” I laughed even more and he mumbled something about hormones and that boys were way better. Liam started to take out stuff from the fridge to make breakfast and I sat down to watch him. I didn’t like not helping but he just gave me a stern look when I tried too. I sat there in silence when he started to fry up some eggs when I heard my phone beep in the bedroom. I hopped off the stool and walked quickly into the room and answered the phone.

“Yeah this is Ross.”

“Hey Ross! It’s Eleanor!” She sounded really happy.

“Hey El!”

“I didn’t wake you right? I remembered that you don’t have school this week after I pressed call.” She laughed at herself and I laughed too.

“Nah it’s fine. Liams making breakfast so it’s fine.” I smiled even though she couldn’t see me.

“Nice! A man needs to take care of his woman!” She spoke with a fake manly voice and then we both laughed.

“Haha, that’s right!” We laughed a little more and then she cleared her throat.

“Well, the reason I called was that I have talked to Danielle.” I took in a deep breath and waited for El to say Danielle didn’t want to see me.

“Oh yeah? Cool.” I spoke awkwardly and face palmed myself.

“Yeah and she could do lunch today.” I let out the breath I was holding and El continued. “Are you free today?”

“Uhm, yeah I am. I just have to convince Liam to let me out. He thinks I will stress myself up over nothing.” I laughed at how ridiculous he was being and El giggled.

“Good luck! How about I pick you up around one? That will give me three hours to go home and change.” She laughed and I joined her.

“Yeah sure! That sounds good. Should I wear something special or?”

“Nah just wear something you comfortable in. I thought we could go to a small restaurant near Piccadilly, is that okay?” I gasped when she said Piccadilly and almost fainted.

“Heck yeah! I love that area, even though I have never been.” She laughed at me, not with me.

“Then maybe we could give you a tour as well?”

“That would be great! If you guys are up for it.” She laughed lightly and then spoke.

“Why don’t we say that we decide after lunch? Who knows, we might eat so much that we can’t move!” We laughed out loud and I heard her make pig noises.

“Sounds great!” I laughed and then heard someone speak to El on the other line.

“Yeah I’ll be right there!” She directed her attention back to me. “Hey Ross, I need to go. Have to do a final shoot then I’ll get to go home. I’ll pick you up at one, okay?”

“Yeah. I’ll see you then! Take care until then! Bye.”

“I will, you too! Bye.” We hung up and I laughed slightly. She was so much fun. I turned around and walked out to the kitchen with my phone in my hand. Liam had placed everything on the table and I smiled at him sweetly before going over to peck him on his cheek.

“It looks delicious.” He smiled and pointed for me to sit down in front of his seat. When we were both seated he spoke.

“Dig in!” I smiled and grabbed a piece of bacon with my fingers. He raised an eyebrow at me and I shrugged.

“Bacon is my drug!” He laughed and I took another piece. I then started to put food on the plate that Liam had placed in front of me. He did the same to his plate.

“Who was it that called?” He spoke with pure curiousness and I smiled.

“It was El. She spoke to Danielle earlier and she could have lunch today.”

“Oh, okay.” He looked around at the table and then noticed something missing.

“Yeah I said I’d talk to you but that it shouldn’t be a problem.” Well I sort off said that. He grabbed juice from the fridge and came back to the table.

“Yeah that’s fine.” He smiled a genuine smile. “You want juice?” I nodded and he poured some in my glass.

“You sure? You don’t think its weird I’m meeting your ex?” He looked up at me and put some egg in his mouth. He shrugged and swallowed.

“Yeah it is a bit strange but I don’t have anything against Danielle. But I don’t care in the sense that I still have feelings for her.” That last sentence he mumbled out fast as lightning.

“Liam, Liam, Liam…” I sighed and ate some eggs. “You really got your head in your ass sometimes.” I laughed and plopped a piece of bacon in my mouth. When I swallowed that I spoke. “I know you don’t have feelings for her. But it can still be weird.” I winked at him and he blushed. Gosh this boy was cute!

“Yeah yeah. When are you going out?” He changed the subject slightly and ate.

“El is picking me up around one. So that gives us three whole hours before she’s here.” I winked at him and he blushed again.

“Is Maddie going with you all?” I face palmed myself again and groaned.

“Crap! I forget to ask! I’ll text El right now and ask.” I picked up my phone from the table and punched in the small words.

To El: Hello Sweets! Forgot to ask you if we are going to pick up Maddie on the way? HugHug!

She quickly responded so I assumed that she was now home and not at work.

From El: Hey Darling! I talked to her earlier and she said she was going to come over to you later. So I’ll pick both of you up! Xxx

I laughed and sighed at myself. I shook my head and then sent a quick text to Maddie, asking when she was going to get here. I looked up at Liam who was studying me. I smiled and he smiled back.

“You are so beautiful.” Every time he gives me an compliment I feel like I don’t deserve it. He made me blush and I looked down at my almost empty plate.

“I am so lucky to call you mine.” I whispered softly and heard Liam get up. He grabbed my hand and made me stand up. His arms wrapped around me and I lifted mine to pull around his neck. “I really mean it. I can’t believe that I can actually say Liam Payne is my boyfriend.” He smiled the biggest smile I have ever seen and I looked at him with a confused stare. He leaned in close and I could feel his breath on my lips.

“It’s the first time you call me your boyfriend.” He kissed me softly and then leaned his forehead on mine. “And I like it.” His soft voice sent shivers down my spine.


I loved the story. The ending was so cute! :)
naaah it's fine I'm just going to be subscribed to it to save the wonderfulness lol
Naah I mean dislike very much because I ended the story ;)
Well I mean I would never hate you.... Unless I know you o.O lol