“Mr. Styles could you please go help the other nurses, you can’t see Zayn today.” The angry woman said over and over again yet Harry refused to listen, he didn’t want to. He had to see Zayn. Zayn was the only nice thing he to look forward to during the day. He had no one besides Tom but even his best friend didn’t give him the comfort Zayn gave him. Something about his childish optimism made Harry feel hopeful; hopeful that not the entire world was evil. But then he would remember the terrible virus running through Zayn’s little body and would realize that the world really is evil it just had a few rays of joy in various places. His ray of light was Zayn.

“Please just let me see him, he needs me; I need him. Please” Harry pleaded for the thousandth time. He needed to see his Zayn. Harry held back every bit of him to not call Zayn his son because in reality he wasn’t, but to Harry, Zayn was his boy.

“Sir I have told you enough times now, you cannot see him today he is very, very ill and shouldn’t be bothered.” The unpleasant woman started to walk away.

“Please, he is the only family I have. Please I beg you,” Harry was now in tears. His voice cracked and shook with each rattled breath. The woman pitied him. A long, drawn out sigh left her lips.

“Ok, fine, but don’t get him too riled up. He needs his rest; he is very week today,” Harry nodded happily and eagerly. He followed the nurse to the children’s ward and into a special room for the “special kids”. In layman’s terms that is where the doctors stuck the kids that they thought were about to die.

Outside the door, Harry could hear coughing and gaging and loud sighs from exhausted nurses. He mustered up as much courage as possible and turned the door knob within his wet, shaky fingers.

“Here goes nothing,” he whispered to himself. He opened the door and his heart plummeted. He locked eyes with a bald girl in the corner. Her eyes were filled with so much angst and pain. Her lips were dry and her eyes were teary and bloodshot. Harry’s breath caught in his throat as he looked around the room; every child looked the same; tired, scared, and lonely. The feelings, quite frankly, are some of the worst feelings and human being can endure let alone a child who has barely had the time to live at all.

He walked up to a pale Zayn Malik with cautious steps. His little body was huddled under his covers and sweat dripped from his forehead even though he had the shivers as well. Harry sighed, something he had been doing a lot lately, as he looked upon the small boy. He traced his hand along Zayn’s burning forehead. Feeling the heat Harry decided to take Zayn’s bandana off so He could cool off a little.

A soft “no,” left Zayn’s lips.

“Ok buddy I’m sorry.” Harry walked over to a sink and soaked the bandana in ice cold water then proceeded to wrap it back around Zayn’s naked head. A content smile grow on Zayn’s face as he fell back to sleep. The nurse smiled at Harry with approval.

“Thank you,” was all she said, all she needed to say.
Harry nodded in reply. He looked down at Zayn once more and kissed his forehead. He walked out the room with tears threatening to spill from his eyes for the second time that morning.

After a few more hours of helping the nurses with some chores, Harry was on his way home, well to Tom’s home.

“Tom?” Harry said, laid out on Tom’s couch with tears in his eyes.

“Harry what’s wrong?” Tom asked with concern in his voice.

“You know Tom I wasn’t always like this.”

“Like what?” Tom asked confused.

“I wasn’t a fool, a nobody, a loner. I had prospects; I was going to do something with my life.” Harry said quietly getting slightly choked up.

“You can still do that; don’t limit yourself Harry.”

“You wanna know something Tom? I never tried to kill anybody; I was trying to kill myself.” Harry said laughing a cynical, smile-less laugh. Tom didn’t know what to say. He sat there moving his lips apart to speak but nothing came out.

“H-harry why… why would you do that? I’m sorry that was a stupid question-“

“No Tom, It’s fine. The truth? I was just spent. I was tired and alone and felt worthless. I lost my parents, the love of my life, my dream school, my home, and I couldn’t take it anymore. I was tired of seeing people look at me with disgust. I used to have a future planned out for me but things changed and I changed with them.” Harry sat there with tears rolling down his face calmly.

“The day I was arrested I had bought as much drugs that I could with the tiny amount of money I had left, which was barely any, and tried to make myself overdose but I couldn’t buy enough drugs to get the job done, I just got really high.” Harry took a few deep breaths.

“I stole a gun from a nearby gun shop and walked into the alley. I guess it isn’t a great Idea to use a gun while high off the walls.” Harry chuckled darkly.

“I couldn’t keep the gun straight so I just shot it. I missed and hit the cop car. They started chasing me and then I met you. I didn’t want to be here. I didn’t want community service or jail, I wanted to be dead.” Harry ended balling his eyes out. Tome sat next to Harry in the couch and engulfed him in a hug and just rocked him back and forth. They first form of love Harry had seen in a long time.

“Thank you Harry,’ Tom said softly. Harry looked at him with confusion.

“I thank you for helping me enjoy my job again. I used to love it because I could help people but soon my job became work instead of something I loved to do. Since I met you Harry, I have come to love my job once again. You have taught me so much more than you give yourself credit for.” Harry smiled and leaned into Tom’s hug.

“Oh and Harry don’t forget, you do have family. You have me and Zayn, so the next time you feel like ending it all, remember that you do have people that love you and I can tell you for a fact that Zayn would not be able to survive if you were gone.”
Harry nodded into Tom’s chest and drifted into sleep. Once Harry was asleep Tom put Harry in his room and put him into bed. Tom stood at the doorway before turning of Harry’s lights.


“I hope it gets better kid,” He said to himself as he turned off the lights and walked to him own room.

Notes

Ok, that was kind of sad... I didn't mean to make it that depressing.

So what do you think? Please leave comments below with feedback and just random things.
Sorry for being such a shitty updater.

I will update The Fire in His Eyes soon! But go check it out if you aren't reading it yet. #selfprommo

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::OBSESSION OF THE WEEK::
My obsession of the week is the new Kardashian Hollywood game! I am obsessed. I am the number one A-lister whoop whoop!!!

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Bye for now
~~Lauryn~~

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