When In Cancun

Niall’s P.O.V

“Did you sleep with her or not Niall?!” She snapped, with sobs threatening. I felt like the shittiest person, I was the shittiest person. I just wanted to cry, how do you admit to the person you love that you slept with someone else? A few moments of silence past before I gained enough courage to give her the truthful answer she deserved.

Y-yes.” I sighed, I had never felt so ashamed of anything in my entire life.

 Ashamed couldn’t even cover it. I was heartbroken at the thought of breaking her heart. I was furious with myself for being a drunken dick.

“Well I hope you got her number too, because maybe she’d like to be your new ‘girlfriend’.”



“NO! Emma you can’t break up with me! I love you! So fucking much it’s ridiculous considering I only just met you. You’re everything to me, everything I need. The only thing I need. It was a mistake and if I could take it back I would, I would give anything to take it back. Please give me another chance, take time to think just please don’t end us before we really had a chance to begin.”


I would do anything for her. I wish I could kick my own ass for hurting her. I knew I was walking on a thin line. There was a slim to none chance that she would be able to forgive me, atleast not right away maybe. Maybe we could just stay together and I could prove myself to her.

“I’ve heard this all before Niall. Remember? My last boyfriend cheated on me too, I clearly remember opening up to you about it. This apology is just like a bad déjà vu to me. I guess I’m just never enough for guys, they have to go and get more from somewhere else. Now, if you will excuse me I’m quite tired and this conversation is exhausting me even more. Have a nice night Niall, and most importantly, have a nice life.” The line went dead before I could even say anything. If I didn’t already hate my self enough, now it was one hundred times worse. How could she think she was not good enough for anyone? She is all I have ever wanted. ‘Well you have a lousy way of showing it!’ My subconscious screamed at me. I slept with another girl when I made a promise to be hers. How could I let this happen? How could I betray her this way? How could I end up doing exactly what her ex did? Especially after I knew how much it broke her. I didn’t ever want to hurt her.

In the middle of my crying Liam came back in the room.

“How’d it go?” He sat on the end of my bed.

“Sh-she broke up with me.” I rolled over and buried my face in the pillows. I was so embarrassed by how much I had been crying lately. I never usually cried. The last time, before I met Emma, was probably when we were voted off the X-Factor.

“It’s alright, don’t worry.” Liam tried calming me down, patting my back gently.

“IT’S ALRIGHT? The love of my life just broke up with me because I slept with some one else! She won’t ever forgive me! She’ll never take me back. I just want her back. I need her back Liam.” I sobbed.

“You will get her back. I know it.” I rolled over and looked at him skeptically. “Trust me. I saw the way she would looked at you. She loves you.”

“Not anymore.”

“You can’t just turn off love like that. She wouldn’t be so upset and heartbroken if she didn’t love you. She’ll come around mate, eventually. Your just going to have to work your ass off to get her back. If that’s what you want you have to prove to her that this isn’t you.”

“What should I do? Call her again? Send her flowers? Go see her? Give her space?”

“You’ll have to figure that out. But I’m going to help you, I promise.”

“How?”

“You’ll see.” He patted my knee before getting up and leaving the room.




It had been two days since my phone call that night with Emma. I didn’t realize how much I missed her until she was gone. I wasn’t complete, I know how corny that sounds but it’s true. It’s like she took half of me with her. I felt so broken inside like I am barely breathing. My guilt was taking over me. I just felt empty, cold and lonely like nobody understood. I was supposed to be in the studio the past two days but I refused to get out of bed unless Liam and Zayn were gone from the flat. I didn’t want to talk to anyone right now. I couldn’t bare anyone’s disappointed glares. The only one I have had contact with is Liam when he brings me food since he thinks I’m not eating. It’s quite the opposite actually. I actually order a lot of food when they’re not gone and eat away my pain. I’m a big eater so it’s somewhat of a distraction. At least I have a fast metabolism; honestly I could eat everyone’s dinner and not be affected. Emma continued to ignore my calls or just let them go to voicemail. I knew she wouldn't pick up but I honestly just liked hearing her voice on her answering machine.

I woke up on the third day to loud knocking on my door.

“Enough of this shit Niall. Get the fuck out of this room! It’s five in the afternoon.” Louis yelled.

“Go away.” I groaned. The door flung open and he came in and wrinkled his nose.

“It smells like old pizza and B.O. in here.”

“Then leave.” I chucked a pillow at him so he would get the hint.

“No, get in the shower before I force you, and I really don’t want to see any of that.”

“Just get out. You don’t even live here.”

“Would you like me to get Liam or Zayn, because I’m sure they would be doing the same thing.”

I grunted and rolled on to my stomach, hiding my face. I felt him grab my ankles and pull me towards the end of the bed. I tried to grab the head board but was too late.

“Nooo!!”

“Yes! I’m sick of this fucking shit. You didn’t show up to the studio for the third day in a row. Managements getting pissed, and we’ve had to cover for your ass. Were going back on tour in a few weeks and you need to be there tomorrow or I will get Paul to personally carry you. Showered and dressed or not.”

“Fine, just let me sleep tonight then. I’ll get up in the morning.”

“You can’t honestly be tired.”

“Well I am.” I climbed back up to the pillows.

“Were going to a pub tonight, your coming. I won’t take no for answer.”

I grunted in response.

“I’ll take that as a yes. And if it wasn’t I don’t give a shit your still coming.”

I heard him walk into my bathroom and a few seconds later I heard the shower water.

“Now are you going to do this yourself, or are you going to have to scar me and make me help you.”

“I’ll do it just get out.”

“Good boy. I’ll be back in an hour to make sure your showered and getting ready.”
With that he walked out. I debated on locking the door and not listening to him but I knew he was serious about coming back. I also didn’t feel like arguing with anyone.
I got up and showered. It actually felt refreshing to clean off all of the grime built up from not showering the last two days. I was trying hard not to think about Emma, but obviously failing. She was always on my mind. Since the moment I first saw her face I have thought about her non stop. I have never seen someone so gorgeous in my life, someone so amazing in every aspect. I couldn’t believe she wanted me. I had her and I blew it.

I got dressed without looking in the mirror. I couldn’t stand to look at myself. I had too much self hatred right now. About an hour later Louis came waltzing into my room with a smug smile on his face.

“Knew you would listen to me.” I gave him the finger before laying back down on me bed which I now realized how bad it smelt. Louis helped me change the sheets and clean up the empty food wrappings around the room.
Around eight I reluctantly agreed to go to the pub with them. Eleanor and Perrie came as well.


We sat at a large table in the back corner of the pub. We usually don't have to worry about fangirls in places like this, but the extra precautions couldn't hurt. I was in a pretty grumpy mood, and Louis continued to throw me death glares. I didn't really care because I was forced to be here, I would much rather wallow in my self pity alone in the comfort of my bed. I spaced out of the conversation for a little while. I didn't want to hear about Zayn and Perrie's wedding plans, or the romantic weekend Louis is spending with Eleanor before we leave for New York. My attention immediately snapped back when I thought I heard Liam say something.

"Your going where?" I asked and everyone turned to look at me.

"Um- I'm visiting Tara at Cornell, when we go to New York. Why?" So I had heard him correctly.

"Take me with you. You have to bring me with you. She can get Emma to talk to me." He gave me a sad and uncomfortable face.

"Honestly Niall, your not exactly Tara's favorite person at the moment. She actually is probably more pissed at you than Emma. You know I will talk to her and do anything I can when I am there. I promised you and I plan to keep it, just trust me."

I grunted and got up from the table to go over to the bar. He's honestly going to go to one of her best friends schools and not bring me. That's like the perfect opportunity.

I ordered a glass of Irish whiskey, and tossed it back. I slammed it on the counter and the cake face busty bar tender smirked while refilling it. She gave me a wink and I fake smiled turning away from her so my back was against the bar. I once again zoned out while observing the pub scene. It isn't hard to guess who was on my mind. I was pulled out from my thoughts when I felt a hand rubbing up and down my bicep. I reflexively jerked my arm, taking a step away. The girl let out an all too familiar nasally laugh. I internally groaned.

"Niall, babe, did I scare you?" She tried being sexy and stepped closer placing her hand on my bicep once again.

"Hello Arleen." I said bluntly.

"What your not happy to see me? I know you are no need to play hard to get."

"Look, I can't do this right now. I have a-" I stopped myself, I was about to say girlfriend. Although she made it clear we were no longer together I still felt this need to be loyal to her. Ironic as that is since me being unfaithful is what got us into this mess. How I wish I could call her my girlfriend. For the short time I was able to, I had never felt more proud in my life. Now I just feel like a piece of shit.

"You have a what? A girlfriend? Who that girl from the tabloids? Doesn't seem like she's your girlfriend anymore, not after what I read." This girl is such an annoying bitch. I can't believe I ever even slept with her. It happened back in January and I couldn't get rid of her. It eventually happened again after a drunk night, but after that I have been dodging her. She always seems to find me. If I didn't have morals on being respectful to women, I would put this bitch in her place.

"Don't always believe everything you read in the tabloids. I'm pretty sure they caught a picture of me and you assuming things, and you never even came close to being my girlfriend. Now, if you'll excuse me." I slammed my drink on the bar again, and walked back to my friends. That was a bit harsh I know, but she asked for it. Trust me it could have been a lot worse.

I drank about two more pints and started warming up a bit. Luckily no one brought up relationship stuff so for a minute I actually found myself not thinking about her. I managed to laugh and have a half decent time. We were getting up to leave when I felt someone grab unto my shoulders from behind. I turned around to find a very drunk Arleen holding on to me for support. She tried to give me a sexy grin but I honestly found nothing attractive about her in that moment. She wasn't bad looking at all, pretty fit actually, but after I've had Emma she was nothing in compare.

"I'm drunk, help me." She giggled.

"Where's your friends? Who did you come here with?" I asked wanting to get rid of her.

"They all left, I told them I was going home with someone else." She smirked. I knew she meant me but I decided to play dumb hoping she would get the hint that I wanted nothing to do with her.

"Who? Is he here? Why don't you call him and the boys and I will wait for him to meet you at the front entrance."

"Okay," She laughed and took out her phone. I looked at her skeptically and then thought maybe she did have another guy, hopefully. I helped her walk to the entrance. Liam and Zayn were waiting on the side walk with a cab. The others must have left already. They looked at me confused and slightly angry.

"Don't look at me like that. She's drunk and I told her we would wait until some one came for her." They nodded. "So are you going to call him?" I asked her but she shook her head no. "Why the fuck not?"

"He wouldn't give me his number and I'm already with him." She jumped wrapping her arms around me and trying to kiss me. I pushed her off before anything happened. I really didn't need paparazzi getting photos of that. Not when I'm trying to get Emma back.

"Look I've already told you no, tonight and many times in the past. So I would appreciate it if you would back off." I said sternly and she giggled at me. Seriously what didn't this girl understand?
She tried kissing me again but slipped and fell on to the ground. She was laughing and complaining about her butt. "What the fuck do I do?" I asked Liam. There was no way I could just leave her here shit faced and alone.

"I guess try and take her home." I sighed and lifted her into the cab. She had to sit on my lap since there wasn't enough room for everyone. She obviously took that the wrong way and played with my hair while kissing my neck. I held her at arms length away from me, just wanting her to stop. I shot Liam and Zayn pleading looks for help but they just shook their head no trying not to laugh. This was not funny.

"Where do you live Arleen?" Liam asked. I had no idea where she lived, the two times I slept with her we had gone back to my place.

"Drury Lane." She giggled.

"What number?"

"The big building." She stretched her arms wide.

"Can you go to the apartment building on Drury Lane?" Liam asked the driver. He looked in the rearview mirror like we were crazy and then started typing something into his GPS. We waited as the driver tried to find the address and Arleen wouldn't stop giggling.

"What's so funny?" I asked annoyed.

"Do you know the muffin man Niall?" She laughed her irritating high pitched laugh.

"No I don't know the- Fuck, Seriously?"

Zayn and Liam cracked up.

"Sir, that's not a real address just take us to our building please." I told the driver. I know she's either is too drunk to remember where she lives or refusing to tell us on purpose. Liam and Zayn stopped laughing and looked at me concerned. "What do you want me to do leave her on the street?" I defended myself.

We got into the flat and she was passed out in my arms.
"Can she please sleep with one of you?" I begged knowing they would turn me down.

"No way, your the only single one here. Plus this is your mess." Liam patted my shoulder before disappearing into his room.

"Sorry mate, Perrie would kill me. Just put her on the couch. Or you sleep there." Zayn shrugged following after Liam.

I groaned and carried her to the couch. I wasn't giving up my bed. I'm usually a gentleman but not when it comes to annoying bitchy girls like her. Any other girl I would have taken the couch for. I brought her out a pillow and blanket to be somewhat nice. I lifted her head placing the pillow underneath and covered her with the blanket.

I sighed in relief and went to my room. I stripped to my boxers before plopping on my bed and quickly falling asleep.

I woke to my loud ring tone. I groggily opened my eyes, it was still dark but I could tell it was early morning. I wasn't planning on answering the call just silencing it but my heart nearly stopped when I saw it was from Poughkeepsie, New York. That's where her school is right? Could she be calling me?

"Hello?" I answered my voice still scratchy from sleep. There was silence for a few moments, but I could hear soft breathing on the other line.
"Emma, is that you?" More silence. It had to be her. This was my chance. "I have caller i.d. no one else would call from Poughkeepsie, New York. What is it love? Please talk to me, I'm so sorry for hurting you baby. These have been the worst days of my life, I need you Emma. You don't understand how much. I fucked up, and I will spend the rest of my life proving to you how sorry I am If you give me the chance."

There were a few more seconds until I heard her angelic voice.

"Niall?" She whispered. My heart filled with an overwhelming sense of joy, just by hearing her say my name and knowing that she called me. Maybe she has thought about me as much as I have about her.

"Yes baby, yes I'm here." I chuckled slightly as happy tears threatened to break loose.

"I think-" She started to say but my eyes went wide as I felt a hand on bicep and the nasal voice.

"Niall! Who is that?" Arleen whined right next to the phone on purpose. She knew dam well who it was. Most importantly when the fuck did she get in my bed!?

"This was a mistake." Emma blurted and I knew she was on the verge of crying.

"No Emma wait!" I tried to get her to stay on the line so I could explain myself but she was gone before I had the chance.

"FUCK!" I cried out pulling my hair. "What the fuck is your problem!?" I yelled at Arleen getting up from the bed. "I don't want anything to do with you! Can't you take a fucking hint? Please just leave me alone your embarrassing yourself by continuously throwing yourself at me! We will never happen again, it was a mistake both times! So get on with your life because honestly it's pathetic. I'll be on the couch. Try and be gone before I wake up." I slammed my bedroom door behind me and checked the clock to find it was almost six o'clock in the morning. I was so pissed off and upset at the same time I ended up not falling back to sleep. I walked over to Louis and Harry's flat with our spare key and borrowed gym clothes and sneakers. I went to the buildings gym and let all of my anger out. No matter how much harder it just got I would find a way to get Emma back. I was not giving up.

Notes