Wilder Mind

Nine.
I woke up to my phone ringing around noon the next day. I started massaging the back of my neck while I sat up. For being on the couch all night I slept surprisingly well. I glanced at my phone to see Nate's name flash across the screen and I decided to ignore it.
I stood up off the couch and plugged my phone in to charge then went into my bedroom to go back to sleep in my bed for a while. It was easier to be asleep. I dosed off for another couple of hours and when I finally woke up for the day I went out into the kitchen to make myself something to eat for breakfast, well now I guess it's a late lunch. I rubbed my eyes and was taken aback when I saw Harry on my couch.
"How'd you get in here?" I asked a little startled.
"I have your spare key remember? You gave it to me for safe keeping." he shrugged and looked back down at his phone.
"When did you get here?"
"About an hour ago, I knocked but you didn't answer so I just decided to come in. How were you still asleep?" he questioned.
"I had a bad night last night." I said and walked toward the kitchen, not feeling like explaining.
Harry stood off of the couch and came and sat down at my counter. I took bread and cold cuts out of the fridge and started making myself a sandwich.
"You want one?" I asked.
"Yeah please I didn't have lunch." he said.
I grabbed a bag of pretzels out of the cupboard and handed them off to Harry. He took them and opened them up while I made him a sandwich.
"Do you want to talk about it?" he pried after a while.
"I really don't but I've got a good feeling you're gonna force me anyway." I groaned as I took a seat next to him.
"What'd she do?" he asked.
"She broke up with me." I said flatly.
"What pushed her to her breaking point?"
"Well she showed no affection at all the whole night and when I went up to her apartment I could feel the tension and I know she didn't want me to be there."
"That's it?" he questioned with a confused look on his face.
"Well, no. I kinda forced us to fight because I couldn't take her being so cold anymore. And I slept with her but didn't let her finish and that's when she told me to get out." I explained.
"You didn't let her finish, oh my god Niall you legend." he laughed.
"I was feeling awfully selfish and I was past the point of caring if she got off too." I laughed with him.
"I'm sorry you guys are over, she's a real idiot for dumping you. She doesn't know what she's giving up." he smiled.
"Thanks man." I said.
I was still feeling pretty terrible and like my life had gone to shit but Harry's kind words could always boost my mood. After we finished our lunch I hopped in the shower to try and pep myself up but I knew nothing was really gonna work tonight. I got out and put my boxers and black skinny jeans on and reached for just a plain tee shirt when Harry barged in through my door.
"I got you a shirt for your birthday and you're gonna wear it." he said holding one out to me.
A normal short sleeved button down with a small butterfly print on it.
"Awfully masculine." I said as I put my arms through it and buttoned it up.
"It's nice." he said defending it.
"Yeah it is nice, you're right." I agreed. "Definitely more masculine than that god awful shirt you have on now."
He reached his arms up to his chest in defense. It was cheetah printed and he knew how dumb I thought that one was.
"You like it you know you do." he said smoothing out a few wrinkles.
He was a little right there, I did like it but I could never get away with wearing it. We sat around watching the tv until we had to go catch the subway to meet up with the guys.
"Oh, Kaine texted me earlier and asked if she could bring along a couple of her friends to the first bar and I said that'd be fine." he said as grabbed his phone from the counter.
"Yeah I don't mind at all." I nodded. "You crashing at Nate's tonight too?"
"I might, depends on whether or not I have to look after you." he teased.
"Yeah I don't really want to be all that coherent tonight, at all." I said.
At nearly 28 years old I was well aware that I couldn't snap back from a hangover as quickly as I used to and I knew I'd regret drinking so much so quickly tomorrow, and possibly Monday as well, but I was going to do it anyway because I don't fucking care.
I locked the door behind me and we rode the subway to meet the guys at the bar. We got off at the subway stop and climbed the stairs up to The Attic. I had never been here before but Nate raved over it and had always wanted to bring us. It was packed upstairs and we walked our way though people to find our friends.
"Hey there's the man of the hour." Liam said handing me a beer.
"We made it." I laughed.
Liam, Louis, and Nate were all standing around a small table looking around the place.
"Is it always this busy Nate?" Harry asked.
"Yeah, especially on warm nights like these, any rooftop lounge gets this way. I met the last two girls I hooked up with while I was here." he said and laughed lightly.
"How'd it go last night Niall?" Louis asked and took a sip of his beer.
"Not so great, I got laid but then she broke up with me." I said trying to laugh.
"Sorry man, I know how much she meant to you." Nate said sympathetically.
"It was a long time coming I think, regardless of the ring it wasn't gonna work out." I shrugged.
"Enough about her tonight, this is about you Niall let's get you wasted by the end of this." Liam said holding his bottle up.
We all clinked our bottles together while Harry went to get the next round. I looked around and had yet to see Kaine and her friends so I pulled my phone out to check the time. Texting her to see where she was wouldn't hurt, would it?
To Kaine: Hey we're still at the attic where are you?
To Kaine: Oh, it's Niall by the way.
I slid my phone back into my pocket and it vibrated almost instantly.
From Kaine: Getting off the subway now see you in a bit!
I smiled and put my phone away again. Harry walked back over to the table with his hands full of bottles and a few shots and placed them down.
"Take two of these and then get another lager in you. We've gotta get her off of your mind." he said nudging me.
I lined up the two shots and threw one of them down the back of my throat feeling the whiskey burn the back of it.
"Thanks man." I said holding up the other.
He had one in his hand as well and held it up to hit mine.
"Here's to 28." he said and we tossed them back at the same time.
Nate wandered off to see if he could find another hookup and dragged Liam along with him. Louis, Harry and I found an area to sit down. About five minutes later Kaine and two other girls approached us.
"Hey guys!" Kaine called through the noise in the lounge.
"Hey Kay thanks for coming." I said standing up and giving her a hug.
"Wouldn't miss drinking with you guys for anything." she laughed and hugged me back trying not to spill her beer.
"This is Penny and Eliza." she said motioning to the pair.
"Nice to meet you guys." one of them said waving.
"And that's Niall, Louis, and Harry. There's two more somewhere around here." she said motioning to us.
Kaine perched on the arm of the couch next to me and the other two girls sat down across from us.
"So you guys all work together?" the blonde one, who I think was Penny, asked.
"Yeah for a couple weeks now. Me and Niall have been there five years and these two just jumped on board." Harry said nodding.
Liam and Nate joined us after striking out with a few girls and they had the introductions too. I was wrong before, Eliza is the blonde one and Penny was the one with the dark skin and cropped hair. We sat around talking for a while longer when it was time we moved on through my birthday mini bar crawl.
"We're gonna get going, do you guys want to come?" Kaine asked the two girls.
"I think we'll stay here a while. I kinda love the aesthetic." Penny said.
"Alright no prob, I'll talk to you guys later." she smiled.
"It was nice meeting you both." I said giving them hugs on our way out.
"Happy birthday Niall, hope we see more of you guys in the future." Eliza said.
"I think we hope to see more of you too." Harry smirked.
"Bye guys." Kay said once more before walking away.
We started making our way out when I tried to stop at the bar.
"If you guys are paying for the drinks tonight I at least need to tip the bartenders myself." I said pulling a few stray dollars out of my back pocket.
"Alright go ahead." Liam said nodding toward the bar.
"No, come on Niall let's go." Kaine said quickly and nervously and grabbed my hand to pull me toward the exit.
She made wide eyes at Harry who apparently got the message and agreed we had to go. Once we were at the stairwell she released my hand and we started walking down the tall flight.
"What was that all about?" I asked.
"It was just getting busy around there." Kay said. "You know, like too much for me." she added in a whisper.
The claustrophobia, I was an idiot. I was a little buzzed and that just completely slipped my mind.
"Oh, I'm sorry." I nodded slowly.
"No it's okay." she said.
We got out onto the street and started walking the few blocks to Quinn's.
"So Kaine, you've got to set me up with one of your friends." Harry said with a laugh.
"Oh no I can't do that." she said simply.
"Why because you want to set me up with both of them?" Nate asked wiggling his eyebrows.
"No not because of that either, they definitely don't want to be with you Nate." she started laughing a little.
"Me and Liam then yeah?" Louis tried.
"No, god you guys are oblivious. Because they're dating." She said.
The guys gave her questioning looks. "They're lesbians wasn't that obvious?" she said laughing.
Harry looked completely stunned along with Nate. I burst out laughing at their reactions.
"Harry, they started laughing when you said you hoped to see more of them, and they were holding hands when we first walked in. Are you guys seriously that dumb?" she laughed.
"I must seriously be the biggest idiot in the world." Harry groaned.
"Yeah you're really not that observant for a proofer, you too Nate come on." Kaine said worsening her blows.
"Alright enough." Nate said getting bitter.
"But H, I'll set you up with my friend Sutton, she's a real piece." she said trying to make things better.
"Alright I'm okay with that." he nodded.
"And me?" Nate asked.
"I've got nobody that could handle you." she teased.
We walked on to Quinn's and I had two beers in me in the first ten minutes we were there.
"I hate to ask but how'd things with Kira go last night?" Kay asked laying a couple shots down between us.
"Real shitty. She broke up with me." I said picking one up.
"Aw man, that sucks. But she really sucks too in my opinion." She said picking up the other.
"Bottoms up." I said hitting mine against hers and we both tossed them back. "I agree she sucks." I added.
"Well, no need to worry about her tonight." she smiled.
Nate ran into his friend Gabe who agreed to have a drink with the six of us. I've met him a few times and he was a really funny guy he roomed with in college. He sat around with us a little while telling a few stories about Nate that made him scowl and blush uncontrollably. I felt myself getting drunk and I welcomed it. I took another shot of whiskey before we decided it was time to head to McKinley's. It was about midnight and we had to finish our mini crawl. Harry grabbed my arm to help me up on one side and Liam on the other.
McKinley's was a few blocks away and I don't recall much of the walk because I was too busy trying to walk in a semi-straight line. I loved that my mind felt fuzzy and that Kira was not on it. We got into the bar and Louis posted me up on a barstool.
"This guy gets anything he wants on our tab." he smiled slipping the bartender ten dollars.
I knew most all of the bartenders here and this guy's name was Frank. He knew me too.
"How's it going f-f-Frank." I slurred and held out my hand for him to shake.
"Eh not bad Niall. Where's your pretty girl?" he asked shaking it.
"Not in the picture anymore as of yesterday. She dumped me, couple days before my birthday." I attempted a smile. "Kaine's a pretty girl though, she's over there."
I didn't mean for that to come out of my mouth but I was just letting everything out tonight.
"Sorry I asked. I'll keep the liquor coming I guess." Frank said ignoring my second comment.
"Yes you will Frank." I nodded.
"Just as long as you aren't driving that is." he added fixing me a drink.
"Not to be frank but does it look like I'm in any shape to drive?" I said through chuckles.
"Pissed drunk and you manage to make a lame ass pun with my name." he laughed and handed me a glass before heading on to his next customer.
Liam slid up into the barstool next to me and ordered a round for the rest of them. When he got that round of drinks I grabbed another and went to sit with them all.
"How are you buddy?" Louis asked.
"Warm." I said taking a sip of my drink.
"Good." Harry nodded and nudged me.
With a few more drinks in me I was pretty shitfaced and had absolutely no concept of time. I heard the bartenders offer last call and someone got up to get me one last drink tonight.
"Fuck, Ethan texted me and he has his girlfriend at our place." Nate groaned.
I physically could not form words to join the conversation and I let my eyes wander around the room when a drink was placed in front of me.
"We can't get him in public transportation either, they'll never let him on, too afraid he'll throw up everywhere." someone said.
They were talking about me but I didn't really notice. I was too lost in this last strong drink and how warm I was feeling inside that I didn't care.
"If one of you helps me, we can walk him back to my place, it's pretty close, he walked me home last week." Kaine said.
I started nodding slowly and ran my fingers through my hair.
"I'll help you out." Harry said.
We finished off the rest of our drinks and the rest of the guys said goodbye to me but I couldn't answer, I just let a few loose words tumble out of my mouth.
"Tuesday-y-y. Yeah?" I tried.
"Yeah we'll see you then buddy. Glad we could get your mind off things." Louis said hitting my shoulder.
Harry helped me out of the booth and threw my arm around his shoulders and grabbed at my waist.
"Up you go Niall." Kaine said taking my other hand and helping Harry out.
"Yup, time to go come on mate." He said and nodded at the bartenders.
"Where?" I asked forgetting the plan already.
"We're walking to Kay's come on." he said dragging me along.
"It's not far remember?" she added.
"Yeah." I nodded.
They talked as I was dragged along the pavement outside, Harry being my crutch. I wasn't paying attention to the conversation but trying to convince myself I wasn't going to throw up. We got to what I recognized as her building and she buzzed us in. Harry continued dragging me to the elevator in the lobby.
We got to her floor and walked a little ways down the hall.
"Take him right to the bathroom probably." Kaine said taking a look at me.
"I'm good." I said looking back at her as she unlocked the door.
"You're not gonna be though." she laughed.
Harry brought me straight to the bathroom and sat me on the floor. It was a small white room with a white toilet and white vanity and white bathtub. Everything was white, except her towels and shower mat.
"You okay? Do you think you're gonna get sick?" he asked me like I was a little kid.
"Everything in here is white." I stated.
"Yeah so when you throw up, it goes in the toilet okay?" he said.
"I won't get sick." I tried.
"Sure." he said and got up and left.
I opened the cupboard and grabbed an old looking towel out of it and laid it down underneath me. Just as I began unbuttoning my pants to take a piss Kaine walked in.
"Oh, sorry." she said.
"It's your bathroom." I attempted a lame ass joke.
"Here, just take a few of these and drink this whole thing before you fall asleep. And here." she said handing me aspirin, a giant water bottle, and a pillow. "Sorry I'm leaving you in here all night but I just don't want you to get sick in my living room."
"I know." I smiled.
I started taking off my jeans right in front of her because apparently old drunk me has absolutely no boundaries.
"Alright, goodnight Niall." she laughed as I fumbled with the buttons on my shirt.
"Yeah night." I said trying to pop them open.
"I like your butterfly shirt so I don't want you to rip off any buttons." she said getting a little closer to me.
She helped my drunk ass undo my shirt buttons and smiled up at me.
"There you go." she said.
"Thanks." I said and gave her forehead a sloppy kiss, because once again drunk me has NO BOUNDARIES.
"Goodnight again." she said and turned away.
I had to slyly readjust myself as she shut the door because I felt myself getting turned on. Once the door clicked I reached into my boxers to fix myself. Her undoing my shirt buttons got me a little heated, I just hope to god it wasn't noticeable. Her smooth finger tip brushing on my chest, fuck. I had to stop thinking about that.
I took my piss finally and swallowed the aspirin and guzzled down the water behind it before I tossed my shirt aside with my jeans. I laid down on the towel on the floor with the pillow and began to drift off a little but I heard voices outside the door.
"What the hell was she doing there?" I think is what Harry asked in a hushed tone.
"With that guy too, I wonder how long it's been going on for." I think Kaine asked.
I felt my stomach hitch and I sat up immediately to throw up in the toilet. Normally I was a one and done kind of person so I hoped that was the case tonight.
I filled the water bottle again and drank just about half of it before laying back on the ground.
I drifted off again thinking off mouthwash and toothpaste, but I could get those in the morning.

Notes