Fireproof (Book 4 in the No Control Series)

After dinner, Liam puts the kids to bed, then joins Liz in the bedroom. “Baby, do you think I should talk to Harry about Sara?” Liz asks.
“I think it would help him to know that we’ve forgiven her.” Liam replies.
Liz picks up her phone, Liam gets up, heading to the door. “Where are you going, Liam?”
“I was going to give you some privacy.”
Liz grins. “You are my husband. I do not need privacy to talk to our friend. Get your cute ass over here.”
Liam smiles, joining her on the bed.
“Lizzie?”
“Harry, it’s Liz and Liam.”
“Is everything alright?”
“Yes, we’re all fine. Sara came over today to talk to us. To apologize.”
“And how did that go?”
“We had a very long talk. I genuinely believe her when she says she’s sorry and that she’s changed.”
“So you’re friends again?” Harry asks.
“Well, I’ve forgiven her but I’m going to need time to completely trust her again.”
“And Liam, you’ve forgiven her?”
“Yes, mate. She seems quite genuine.” Liam replies.
“You two know me, I’m not in the habit of hating anyone. I’m certainly capable of forgiveness. I was honestly more upset about what she did to you.”
“Harry, just go with your gut. Do what you feel is right for you.” Liz says.
“I will, Lizzie. You do the same.”
“Bye, mate.” Liam says.
“Bye, Liam. Give the kids my love.”
“We will. Bye, H.” Liz says before hanging up.
Liz looks at Liam. “What’s with that grin?”
“That felt quite normal for a change.”


Harry looks down at the phone in his hand, smiling. That’s the first time I was able to talk to Lizzie without a massive pain in my chest. He thinks.
Scrolling through his phone he finds an old friend.
“Harry?”
“Hi, Alice. Are you busy?”
“I’m never too busy for you, H.”
“I thought I’d update you on the Lizzie situation. Are you free for a drink?”
“Absolutely. I’ll meet you at our usual place.” Alice says.

From their table at the back of the pub, Harry fills Alice in on all the latest Lizzie news.
“So you’re over Liz?” Alice asks.
Harry laughs. “I wouldn’t say that. This time however, I am trying to move on. I can proudly say that I spoke to her and Liam on the phone tonight and I did not have that familiar massive ache in my heart.”
“I could tell from reading your journal how much you loved her. Love like that is going to take time to move past.” Alice says.
“What would I do without you, Alice? You always understand.” Harry smiles.
Alice blushes. “Well. I’ve put up with you for so many years now.”
Harry laughs.
“So, this Sara sounds like a nightmare.” Alice says.
Harry shakes his head. “No, most of the time I spent with her she was quite wonderful. I felt comfortable with her and we had fun together. But...well sometimes there was a distance from her that I couldn’t understand.”
“Maybe that was the jealous Sara sneaking out?”
“Maybe. I’m not sure if I was just gullible and fell for her act...or if I saw the real Sara?” Harry says.
“The real Sara?”
“The sweet girl who got tangled up in a web of pain.”
Alice grins. “You love her.”
Harry looks up surprised. “Stop.”
“Well you have feelings for her at least.” Alice insists.
“Okay, yes I have feelings for her. I...well...I miss her. Is that weird?”
Alice nods. “Yeah, that’s totally weird.”
Harry smirks, recognizing his friend’s teasing.
Alice grins. “It’s not weird at all. You know better than anyone that feelings can’t be turned on and off like a faucet.”
Harry looks down.
“Will you forgive her?” Alice asks.
He looks up at his friend. “I’ll forgive her if she’s genuinely sorry. The problem is I’m not sure if I can give us a second chance. I’m not sure my heart can take another break.”
Alice reaches across the table, taking her friend’s hand in hers. “I’m here for you always, no matter what you decide.”
Harry smiles, squeezing Alice’s hand.

************
Harry’s Journal

I received a letter from Sara today. I paced back and forth in front of it for nearly an hour. Why was I so afraid to open it? I finally sat on the sofa with my legs stretched out in front of me, took a deep breath and opened it.


Dearest Harry,
I’m praying the words on this page will be able to convey how very sorry I am for the horrible things I’ve done. I could list all the reasons why I did what I did...but I owe you more than that. I felt closer to you than I’ve ever felt to anyone else in my life. You and I connected in a way I’d never experienced before. Therefore I won’t give you excuses for my actions.
The day you left my apartment was the day I woke up. Watching you walk out of my life forced me to take a long hard look at who I’d become. I didn’t like what I saw.
I’ve been seeing a counselor and he has me opening wounds that I’ve been bandaging for years. I am now giving them the attention they require, rather than burying them. I had to face a side of myself I didn’t like. But I’ve already rediscovered a lightness to myself that I’ve missed.
I need you to know, Harry, that I’m arduously working on becoming a better person. I am truly sorry for the pain I caused to the people I love. Mainly Liz...and you. I’m sorry I used you in my ugly vendetta; admittedly a completely uncalled for vendetta.
I’m hoping you can still remember the fun times we had, the times that ugly Sara wasn’t around. Harry, I need you to know that I’ve fallen in love with you, and I realize you may never be able to feel the same way about me because of what I’ve done.
I have no right to ask for your forgiveness...but I am. Please forgive me, Harry. I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you, convincing you I’ve changed. I want nothing more than to earn your trust back.
Please know that I am sorry with every fiber of my being. I love you...I’ve never told a man that before.
I will spend every moment of every day finding ways to make things right between us.

I would love to see you, to talk. Take your time...I’ll be here.

Love, Sara

And now...I’m more confused than ever. Shit…….

Notes