Fireproof (Book 4 in the No Control Series)

Part of Liz wants to get up and comfort her friend, the other part still so hurt. “Is that why you used Harry to hurt me?” Liz asks.
“Something ugly overcame me, Liz. I didn’t think you deserved this privileged life.”
Liz stands. “Privileged life? Sara you know damn well that I’ve had rough times. Losing my parents, putting myself through college and the abuse from Jake.”
“I agree, Liz. But at the time I could only see you through eyes green with envy. So I went to that party and pretended to get drunk. I told strangers things about your relationship that you’d told me in confidence. I knew that someone would sell a story.”
“So you intentionally hurt my family?” Liz asks.
“Yes.” Sara’s eyes fill with tears. “And then I used Harry to hurt you more. Once I moved here, you began to confide in me about the Harry situation. I thought I could steal him away from you.”
Liz shakes her head. “He was never mine to steal.”
Sara returns to the sofa. “That’s where you are wrong, Liz. You own that man’s heart whether you realize it or not.”
“Why would you hurt him? He’s done nothing to you except be kind.” Liz raises her voice.
“I was so blinded by jealousy that I wasn’t thinking clearly.”
Liz wrings her hands, trying to stay calm. Desperately trying to find some compassion for her friend. “So that day at your flat, you planned everything?”
Sara looks down, obviously ashamed. “Yes, I had purposely ignored your calls. Then I contacted Caroline and she told me you’d be coming over. So I made sure Harry and I would be half dressed, knowing you’d be shocked.”
“You told Harry you’d spoke to me about the two of you seeing each other and that I was fine with it?” Liz asks, already knowing the answer.
“Yes.”
“And that I told you I had no feelings whatsoever for him?”
Sara begins to cry. “Yes. I hurt him and I hate myself for it.”
Liz is genuinely surprised by Sara’s reaction. “Sara, I am sorry for the things I said to you that day. I feel terrible about it.”
“Honestly Liz, you don’t need to apologize, but I appreciate it. I provoked you, so I can’t blame you for trying to hurt me.” Sara sighs. “Besides, it was all true.”
“So you are saying your excuse for all the horrible things you did to hurt me is because you were jealous of me?”
“Actually Liz, there is no excuse for what I’ve done to you. I was jealous, but that is my problem not yours. You did nothing wrong.”
Liz stands, walking across the room. Sara follows her. “I am so sorry for everything I’ve done to you, Liz. You didn’t deserve any of it. I am asking you to please forgive me. I miss our friendship. I will spend the rest of my life making all of this up to you.” Sara puts her hand on Liz’s shoulder. “Please, Liz. I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness. I also know that you are a far better person than I am.”
Liz turns to look at her friend. “Sara, I’m going to need time. I miss you too, well, I miss the old Sara. The girl I trusted so much that she was the only one I confided in when I began a friends with benefits relationship. I trusted her to keep my secret and I knew she wouldn’t judge me.” Liz pauses. “This jealous Sara, she broke both of those things.”
“I understand completely, Liz. Please just give me a chance? I know it will take a lot of time, but I want to prove to you that I’m a new Sara. I want to be a better person.”
Liz turns away from Sara. “And Harry?”
“I’m sure he hates me and can never forgive me, but I’m going to do everything I can to beg him for his forgiveness.”
Liz turns back to face her. “Sara, I think it upsets me more that you hurt Harry than that you hurt me. He was an innocent victim in your vendetta.”
Tears are streaming down Sara’s face. “I know, Liz. While I was using Harry to hurt you...I...I fell in love with him. And my biggest fear is that he will never forgive me.”

Notes