Flawed [Ashton Irwin]
Chapter ten
Luna
There is something about shopping I just can’t seem to understand. Why is it such a big deal? Sure, it’s nice to buy yourself some things from time to time and wander around in different stores, but spending hours looking through clothes, food, home décor or even departments full of scented candles, just seems pointless to me. It is one of the things that my mom and I never had in common. I remember dreading the days when she said we are “going shopping”. That basically meant me sitting in a corner while she walked around and put countless things in her cart. Over time I had come to like it a bit more, actually buying myself cute things I see around, like decorations for my room or books. That kind of stuff I enjoy, but trying on clothes after clothes I absolutely hate. And that happens every time my mom takes me with her to the mall.
This Sunday morning she decided that it would be a great idea to hit the mall and literally make me try on a whole summer collection. I just don’t see the point of it, the clothes I have from last summer still fit me, I didn’t grow all that much over the year so I don’t know why she thinks I would need a complete change in my wardrobe. I guess this is the only thing my mom likes to do with me, buy me clothes. Besides that, we don’t really do much together. She used to drive me to school in the mornings when I was younger, but that came to an end when she just stopped coming at home. She usually arrives in the early hours of the morning, or doesn’t even come at all, most likely working all night in her office. Sometimes I worry about her, but then remember that’s just the way she is, a workaholic. There’s no way of stopping her.
The Beverly Center is surprisingly not crowded, but then again, it is only eleven in the morning so I don’t expect it to be. My mom is wandering around Victoria’s Secret while I just sit in a corner, eyeing some cute pajama bottoms. Of course they are placed too high for me to reach, so I just look at them, instead of actually getting a pair to try on. The workers seem really tired and talk among themselves, so I don’t want to bother them. I spot my mom walking towards the changing rooms, and I know we are going to be here for a really long time. Sighing, I walk out of the pink decorated store and sit on a bench outside, pulling out my phone.
Quickly wiping the screen on my jeans, I press the home button and unlock it, seeing I have a new message from my dad. Rolling my eyes at the text that says “Should I invite your aunt Margaret to the wedding?” I don’t reply, but instead type a text to a different person.
iMessage to: Ashton
are you awake?
After about five minutes of waiting and bouncing my foot up and down, I decide to walk around since there is nothing better I can do right now. Entering Forever 21, I start looking around all the random stuff, starting from jewelry to shoes, finding a few nice things that I think I might buy. A soft tune by Twenty One Pilots is playing in the background and I quietly hum along, finding a cute pair of sneakers and looking for my size. My phone starts buzzing in my pocket and I take it out to answer it, still searching through the shoe boxes.
“Hello?” I mumble and smile when I finally spot the right size.
“Morning.” A raspy voice greets and I sit down on a chair to try on my new shoes.
“Good morning, hope I didn’t wake you up.” His morning voice is something I have heard one time before and I can say that it is very pleasing.
“It was about time I got up anyway.” He chuckles lightly and I nod, even though he can’t actually see me.
“Sorry to bother.” I mumble and slip my foot in the blue sneakers, smiling to myself. Perfect fit. “I was just bored.”
“At eleven in the morning?” His voice cracks a bit and he clears his throat.
“My mom made me tag along to the mall today, we’re shopping.” I put my sandals back on and the silly designed sneakers in their box, getting up to go pay for them.
“Why so sad? I thought girls like shopping?”
“Well this girl doesn’t.” I roll my eyes and approach the cashier, smiling at her and muttering a “hello.”
“Then why don’t you just leave?” As if I could.
“You don’t understand, if my mom takes me shopping, then we are gonna shop. There’s no going back.” I can hear him laugh on the other line as I take out my card and hand it to the girl in front of me.
“Glad I’m not a girl then.” I huff slightly, but kind of agree. “So have you talked to your dad?”
“Uh, no, not yet.” I struggle to put my wallet back in my bag while holding the phone between my shoulder and ear. “But I’ll give him a call tomorrow, don’t worry. He’s currently very stressed about the wedding invitations so I didn’t want to bother him.” I laugh lightly and thank the girl behind the counter, before taking my bag and leaving the store.
“Oh yeah, sure, no problem.” Going back towards Victoria’s Secret I see my mom also paying for the stuff she bought and I wait outside for her.
“Hey.” I suddenly think of something. “Do you want to maybe come over to my place? I’ve got a lot of books I could show you and a freezer full of ice cream.” Just thinking about ice cream makes me kind of hungry.
“You really do love ice cream.” He laughs and I just shrug, because I mean, it’s true. “Um, sure, I guess.” He sounds kind of uncertain.
“If you don’t want to, don’t worry. I’m most likely going to be home alone and I guess I wanted some company, but it’s totally fine if you have other plans.” I rush the words out, not wanting him to feel like I am pressuring him or something. It’s just that sometimes I tend to get quite lonely.
“No, no, Luna, it’s totally fine, I want to.” I smile at the reassurance and my eyes slightly widen when I see the amount of bags my mom is carrying right now. “I would love for you to introduce me to your antic books and your strange addiction for ice cream.”
“Okay.” I laugh and shift my phone to my other ear, waving at my mom when I notice her looking around most likely for me. “I’ll see you around five or six?” I suggest knowing my mom and I will most likely spend another three hours here and I will also need some time to clean around my room and unpack all the stuff we are going to buy before he arrives.
“Sure. Good luck with your shopping, Luna.” He giggles and I bite my lip to keep myself from laughing. I swear, guys giggling is the funniest thing I have ever heard. Especially this guy.
“Bye, Ashton.” I end the call and slide the phone in the back pocket of my jeans.
“I see you got yourself something.” My mom smiles slightly and I just nod, my small bag not even comparing to her already five huge bags full of items.
“I’ll have a friend come over later, if that’s okay?” I look up at her, hating the fact that she is wearing high heels, making me look like a toddler next to her.
“A friend?” Her eyebrows raise.
“Yes.” I nod. “You know, the guy I got in… trouble with, a few weeks ago.” I try not to say the word jail since I know she won’t appreciate it.
“Oh, him.” She slowly nods, licking her red stained lips. “Well if he’s your friend, of course. What’s his name?”
“Ashton.” I answer although I don’t really understand her curiosity. I mean, she’s never home so I don’t think she will ever even get to meet him.
“Ashton, sure, you two can have fun, I’ll be at the office.” She then starts walking ahead of me, already entering the next store and I sigh, following behind.
“Of course you will.” I whisper.
My feet are killing me, the white sandals I wore proving to be not so comfortable as they left some pretty bad blisters on my ankles. After taking a cold shower to try and cool down, I dress in a pair of shorts and an old shirt that I’m pretty sure used to belong to my dad. I mean, I am an AC/DC fan myself, but not that big of a fan to have a tee shirt with their logo, so it must have been his. After nicely folding all the clothes from around my room and putting them in my closet, I go over to my desk to clean all the scattered drawings and notebooks I used in the past few days, putting them in place and also opening my windows to let some fresh air in the room.
Looking around the room, I spot that in the corner some paint chipped from the wall. Last time I painted my walls was over a year ago, maybe I should do it again. The different shaped clouds look almost dull now, indicating that it is definitely time for a change. Going downstairs, I already see my mom’s car speeding away and I sigh, picking the dozens of bags she left in the living room and carrying them to her room. Why does she need so many things again? After that I just decide that I have nothing better to do with my time, so I guess I’ll just sit around, maybe watch a tv show or read a book.
I really appreciate old literature, I love me some Shakespeare and Jules Verne, or even Jane Austen. But I do like reading recent books as well. There are a lot of talented writers and sometimes I wish I had the same passion they do, but I don’t think I ever will. I enjoy art more, design, paintings, music, it’s just something I have always been drawn to. But I do love reading, fiction, romance, anything that captures my attention. I guess I have always been kind of a book nerd.
I hear the doorbell ring right as the clock hits six and I leave the book I was busying myself with, running to look out the window. Pressing the button for unlocking the gate and opening the front door, I wait for Ashton to cross the small distance to the house as he looks around at nothing in particular, probably just at the flowers or maybe the garage door, I don’t know. He smiles brightly and mutters out a soft “hello” before taking his hands out of his pockets.
“Well, come in then.” I open the door wide and wait for him to step inside.
“Do I have to like wipe my shoes or something?” He asks uncertain and steps inside, his eyes moving around the big hallway.
“Nah, just take them off. If there are any spots on the carpet, my mom will kill me.” I laugh slightly and he nods, quickly kicking his Vans off and placing them next to the other pairs that are lined against the wall. I don’t like keeping my shoes in boxes or in my closet like my mom does, I can easily just pick the pair I want this way. “Follow me and try not to get lost.” I joke and walk back towards the living room, his feet padding behind me, most likely taking my words seriously.
“Your house is…” He trails off and I raise an eyebrow.
“Big?” I guess but he shakes his head.
“Nice.” I laugh at that.
“Thanks. You want a tour?” I giggle slightly and walk towards the couch, sitting back down and turning down the volume of the music channel that was on before.
“Sure.” He nods and sits down next to me, pulling out the big and most likely uncomfortable white pillow from behind him.
“I was kidding.” I clarify and his lips part and he nods slowly.
“Oh, sure, so was I.” Shaking my head, I mark the page of the book I was previously reading and placing it on the coffee table in front of me, turning back to face Ashton.
“Seriously, do you want me to show you around? It could take us a while.” There are some parts of the house that I personally find really cool and I think he would also like them.
“Yeah, I wouldn’t mind, I mean, I don’t want to get lost while looking for the bathroom.” He chuckles and I nod, because that wouldn’t be the first time someone actually lost their way around here. Including me.
“Alright then.” I get up and pull my tee shirt a bit farther up so it doesn’t look as if I’m not wearing pants, because I hate when that happens; and he follows my actions.
“Nice shirt. I got one myself.” He comments and I smile.
“Thanks. I think it’s my dad’s.” I shrug and guide him out of the living room and up the marble stairs to the second floor. “Oh, come here, I want to show you something.” I walk quickly towards the last room down the hall.
Opening the door, I let him inside before closing it behind us. Switching the lights on, I pull back the curtains and open the balcony doors, letting some fresh air in the room that hasn’t been opened in quite a few days. Turning back around to look at Ashton, I clap my hands and smile.
“Isn’t the view just dreamy?” I sigh and indicate for him to come closer.
You can see in the distance the beach, the sun shining bright above the water. There are a lot of palm trees and beautiful shades in the skyline. Maybe he doesn’t understand it, the beauty I find in this world, nobody really understands it, but I hope he will. He gets all the things I love, starting from the beautiful designs of clouds to my love for old books and ice cream.
“It’s pretty.” He agrees and leans his body on the edge of the balcony, looking into distance.
“Oh no, don’t do that.” I grab his shoulder and pull him back a little.
“Why, is it like not stable?” He frowns and I shake my head.
“No, no, it’s not that.” I don’t know how to explain this to him. “It’s just that, I don’t like it when people get that close to the edge, it’s kind of dangerous. I mean, look down.” I gaze down at the bushes of roses. “You lean a few more inches and you might fall and die.”
“You’re not gonna die.” He laughs. “It’s only like five or six meters.”
“That is a lot.” I shake my head and pull him back a few more steps.
“Okay, okay, whatever makes you feel safe.” He smiles and I nod, before slowly walking back inside.
“I just like the view, that is one of the only reasons I come out here.” Stepping inside, I point in a different corner of the room. “That’s the other reason.”
The big piano has collected a bit of dust and also has some papers scattered on top of it, from the last time I was in here. There is a drawer full of other songs and notes in it right behind it, that I have saved along the years.
“You play?” He questions surprised and walks towards the big instrument, sitting down on the bench in front of it, lightly touching the keys.
“Used to.” I shrug. “I still do, sometimes. But not as often as I did before.” Sitting down next to him, I gather the papers on top of the piano and place them in a pile.
“What can you play?” He questions and I chuckle lightly.
“I prefer Beethoven.” He nods smiling.
“Okay then, show me something.” I shake my head.
“A sonata is at least fifteen minutes long, I don’t think I even remember them that well.” He just ignores me and takes my hands in his, pressing them on the keys.
“Try.” He whispers and I have to shake away the feeling of his warm skin on mine before I might actually start shivering.
“Okay.” I nod and look at him for a few more moments, before going through the pile of papers knowing I have it in there. And there it is, the notes to “Moonlight Sonata” laid perfectly. I place it in front of me and sigh deeply, before pressing down onto the keys.
It all comes back to me, the music just flows so naturally and every note fits perfectly next to the other. It’s like I didn’t even stop playing so long ago, but to be honest, every time I get the chance I do try and rehearse this melody, because it is just way to beautiful to be forgotten. Of course, I don’t remember all of it, but the first part of the song goes extremely casual and I love the fact that I can still remember something I learned so many years ago. I don’t want to bore Ashton too much, so I believe that just the first movement out of the three, which is about five minutes, is just fine. I mean, I told him the whole sonata is pretty long.
Even though I could continue, my fingers dancing on top of the keys lightly, I stop because I know I might not do so if I get way too into it. The sound of a piano is something that always makes me quite emotional, just thinking on how is has impacted my life and so many other people’s lives, it’s just magical. There is something about it, it gives away a unique sensation, almost like a high, which makes me feel happier each and every time.
Clearing my throat I move my fingers away from the keys after pressing the final note and place my hands in my lap. Looking up at Ashton, his eyebrows are furrowed, but his lips are parted, the rest of his face seeming extremely relaxed.
“Why’d you stop?” He questions.
“I told you, it’s long, I only played a part of it.” I shrug and he nods slowly.
“That was amazing. Really beautiful, Luna.” My cheeks heat up and I look down again at the keys.
“Thanks.” I mumble and then sigh. “Okay, let’s go, we’ve been in here for a while.”
After showing Ashton around, we decided to go downstairs in the kitchen so I could get us some ice cream before we went to my room and I showed him some of my favorite books. Opening the freezer, I take out all the different flavors I can find and place them on the table.
“Okay, what would you like?” He smiles at the crazy amount of ice cream I have taken out and shakes his head slightly.
“I think you might develop a health problem if you keep eating this much sugar on the daily.” I just shrug, because he’s most likely right, but I couldn’t be bothered by it. “I’ll have vanilla.”
“That’s boring.” I roll my eyes and take out two bowls.
“I like it simple.” He giggles.
I choose three different flavors and my bowl looks a lot more colorful than Ashton’s. After getting two spoons I hand him his and we walk back up the stairs to my room. I haven’t shown him only two places in the house; my room and the laundry room. It’s actually a very nice place, it smells fresh and it has some nice varieties of detergents. Opening my bedroom door, I walk straight to my bed and take a seat, bringing my knees up to my chest and taking a spoonful of my dessert, enjoying the pistachio flavor.
“I like your walls.” He points at the clouds I have painted a year ago and I nod.
“Yeah, I really need to repaint them. The color started to flake off.” He sits down on the other side of the bed keeps looking around.
“Oh, you like My Chemical Romance?” He questions, spotting the few posters above my desk.
“And Fall Out Boy.”
“I like a lot of bands.” I nod.
“Such as?” He questions and looks back at me but I just shrug. “Right, that damn riddle.”
“Sorry, but not sorry.” I giggle and continue eating my ice cream.
“And that poster?” He asks and looks right above my bed at the huge poster that I had custom made a few years ago.
“That, my dear friend Ashton.” I put my bowl on my night stand and smile big. “Is Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany’s.” I explain turning around to look at him. “The most beautiful and classic romantic comedy of all time.”
“Your favorite movie?” He tilts his head to the side smiling.
“Maybe.” I smile back and sigh looking up at the beautiful poster.
“I’ve never seen it.” He suddenly confesses and I turn around shocked.
“Impossible.” I shake my head. “You spent eighteen years of your life clueless about this masterpiece?”
“Seventeen and eleven months.” He corrects me but I ignore his comment.
“I cannot accept that.” I quickly get up from my bed and walk towards the other side of the room.
Looking through the large amount of books, I finally get the one I was looking for. Wiping the small amount of dust that has settled on it, I inspect it for a few moments, fixing the corners that have slightly bent. Walking back towards Ashton, I hand him the orange covered book and dismiss his frown.
“Breakfast at Tiffany’s, by Truman Capote. You have to read it.”
“I thought it was a movie.” I roll my eyes.
“Yes, it is also a movie, but how do you think that movies are made?” I ask rhetorically and he shrugs confused. “After books, dummy.” I clarify and his mouth parts in realization.
“Yes, of course.” He laughs slightly. “But why can’t I just watch the movie?”
“Because.” I huff. “First you read the book, then you watch the movie. It’s like a rule, you can’t break it.”
“Okay, okay.” He raises his arms in surrender. “I’ll read it, if it makes you happy. I promise.” I nod content and get my ice cream bowl back.
“Now, tell me what your favorite movie is.”
After getting about three more refills of ice cream (for me, Ashton didn’t want any more, but it’s his loss, I guess) and finding out his favorite movie, The Pursuit of Happiness, which I have yet to watch, and other random facts about him, it had now gotten dark outside and we have discussed a ton of books. I made a small pile of books for him, which he has to read because they are really good, such as Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen or The Fault In Our Stars by John Green.
“Aren’t you hungry?” I ask when I see it is almost nine o’clock. “I mean, I ate a lot of ice cream, but you didn’t.” I get up from my spot on the bed where we have been laying for a couple hours and open the door to walk downstairs.
“Actually, yes.” He follows behind me. “I was going to say something, but then again you got distracted by your books.” I guess he’s right.
We go downstairs in the kitchen and I open some cabinets, looking for something that we could actually eat. There is a lot of cereal and granola bars, but none of them are something Ashton nor I want right now. I tell him to check different drawers while I go in the fridge. Great, my mom and I went clothing shopping today, but we forgot about groceries.
“I could do some Pop Tarts.” Ashton says and pulls out a box of cookies and cream Pop Tarts.
“Sure.” I nod and close the fridge as he opens the box. “Are you one of those people that toasts them?” I scrunch up my nose.
“Sometimes.” He shrugs.
“Well, don’t, they’re better as they are.” Opening one I take a bite and sit down on a chair, Ashton taking a seat next to me.
“I like your hair.” He comments and I frown.
“Why? It’s always messy.” I run my fingers through it, proving my point as they get stuck in the tangles.
“Exactly.” He smiles with a mouth full and I almost cringe.
“Don’t talk with your mouth full, please.” He rolls his eyes but doesn’t speak.
“Can I tell you a riddle?” He asks and wipes his mouth.
“Sure.” I laugh.
“Mary’s dad had five daughters, the first one was called-“ I stop him before he can even finish.
“The fifth daughter is Mary.” I roll my eyes and he scoffs.
“You didn’t even let me finish.” He takes another bite of his Pop Tart and mumbles under his breath. “Rude.”
“It was predictable.” I shrug my shoulders and get up to throw away the wrappers from the table. “Come on, there is one more place in this house I would like to show you.” I tug his hand and he quickly stuffs the food into his mouth, before following me.
Running up the stairs and climbing into the attic, I can hear Ashton panting beside me, probably from coming all the way up here. The only light in the room comes from the moon that is now up in the sky. I walk towards the other side of the room and move a chair in front of me, climbing it and opening the skyline window, propping myself up on the edge.
“Are you coming or staying?” I ask Ashton who is still in the doorway. He nods quickly and walks towards me.
“Are you sure this is safe?” He grunts also climbing up on the chair and looking outside.
“Of course.” I step out and sit down on the edge of the rooftop, admiring the beautiful Los Angeles night sky.
I hear him hissing in pain, probably banging his head against the window, which had also happened to me a few times before. After struggling to get up next to me, he just sits for a few moments and catches his breath. You can see all the way to Downtown LA from here. It is beautiful. All the city lights and tall buildings illuminating the whole city. It is something that I have always admired, how quiet it looks from a distance, even though it is one of the loudest places. But from up here all the people seem irrelevant, the only thing that matters is the colorful lights dancing around, almost reflecting in the dark skyline.
“It’s pretty.” Ashton mutters from beside me.
“It is magical.” I sigh and bring my knees up to my chest, gazing into distance.
“How comes you’re not afraid of falling from up here?” He questions.
“Because I can’t see the ground. It feels as if I am above the world, but there is also nothing down there that could hurt me.” My answer comes out easily.
“Are you afraid of heights?” I shrug.
“Maybe. I don’t like seeing the ground and not being able to touch it. That’s why I never look down.” I glance back at him and see how beautiful the moonlight reflects into his eyes. He just nods.
“There is a full moon tonight.” I look up to the sky and point at the beautiful moon. “It’s pretty.”
“So are the stars.” He comments.
“I don’t like them.” I shake my head and look at my socks, twisting the white cotton between my fingers.
“Why not?” I don’t even have to look at him to know he is frowning.
“They only hold lies.” I whisper and he leans a bit closer to the edge, but I grip his arm and look up at him. “Don’t.”
“Sorry.” He mumbles and comes closer to me, his shoulder brushing against mine. “But what makes you believe that?” I sigh.
“It’s a complicated story.” I shake my head.
“I like complicated things.” I can almost hear the smile in his voice. “Try me.” He’s just way too cute to handle.
“My dad chose a star for me when I was little.” I decide on just explaining my reason to him, instead of dodging the subject. “It used to be my lucky star.” I smile and lean my head on my knee. “Every night we would look up at the sky and make a wish upon it. They proved to come true most of the time.” Thinking about it, I know my wishes as a kid were kind of silly. “And then the night my parents separated, I tried to find the star. I wished it would bring them back together.” I bite my lip and look up at the sky. “It died the very next day.” I shake my head. “It fell into oblivion and took away all my wishes.” Looking into Ashton’s eyes, I concentrate onto his beautiful green orbs instead of the ugly memory. “That’s the day I lost all my belief in wishing upon a star.” I laugh without humor. “There is no such thing.”
We sit in silence, goosebumps rising on my skin from the chilly summer air surrounding us. I wrap my arms around my knees to try and keep warm. The wind blows away the wild hair from my face and I close my eyes, trying again for what feels like the millionth time to wipe away the memory of the falling star. Suddenly Ashton’s arm wraps around my waist, his warm flannel now coming around my body as well. He tugs me closer and I lean into his side, placing my head onto his shoulder.
“I don’t know how a girl like you can hate the stars.” He whispers, his warm breath fanning over the side of my head.
“A girl like me?” I frown at the comment.
“Your eyes, Luna.” He says and I look up at him, propping my chin onto his shoulder.
“They’re blue?” I ask confused and he shakes his head, looking deeply into my eyes almost as if he is awestruck.
“They hold galaxies in them.” He whispers softly and my breathing stops for a moment. “There is a beautiful skyline above us, full of constellations, but the only stars I can gaze into are the ones in your eyes.” I swallow hard and blink slowly, taking in his words. ”I can’t relate to your story, but I am asking only one thing of you.” He slowly brushes a few strands of hair out of my face with shaky fingers. “Never hold hatred for the galaxies inside your eyes.”
Slowly prying my gaze away from his, I look away towards the city and think about what he had just said. I don’t even know how I should feel. I am just… overwhelmed. Never have I thought so highly about something as simple about me as my eyes. I guess he just points out random things about me as I do about him. I lean back into his side and hide my face in the warm material of his flannel, sighing upon feeling the beautiful scent of his cologne.
“I won’t.”
There is something about shopping I just can’t seem to understand. Why is it such a big deal? Sure, it’s nice to buy yourself some things from time to time and wander around in different stores, but spending hours looking through clothes, food, home décor or even departments full of scented candles, just seems pointless to me. It is one of the things that my mom and I never had in common. I remember dreading the days when she said we are “going shopping”. That basically meant me sitting in a corner while she walked around and put countless things in her cart. Over time I had come to like it a bit more, actually buying myself cute things I see around, like decorations for my room or books. That kind of stuff I enjoy, but trying on clothes after clothes I absolutely hate. And that happens every time my mom takes me with her to the mall.
This Sunday morning she decided that it would be a great idea to hit the mall and literally make me try on a whole summer collection. I just don’t see the point of it, the clothes I have from last summer still fit me, I didn’t grow all that much over the year so I don’t know why she thinks I would need a complete change in my wardrobe. I guess this is the only thing my mom likes to do with me, buy me clothes. Besides that, we don’t really do much together. She used to drive me to school in the mornings when I was younger, but that came to an end when she just stopped coming at home. She usually arrives in the early hours of the morning, or doesn’t even come at all, most likely working all night in her office. Sometimes I worry about her, but then remember that’s just the way she is, a workaholic. There’s no way of stopping her.
The Beverly Center is surprisingly not crowded, but then again, it is only eleven in the morning so I don’t expect it to be. My mom is wandering around Victoria’s Secret while I just sit in a corner, eyeing some cute pajama bottoms. Of course they are placed too high for me to reach, so I just look at them, instead of actually getting a pair to try on. The workers seem really tired and talk among themselves, so I don’t want to bother them. I spot my mom walking towards the changing rooms, and I know we are going to be here for a really long time. Sighing, I walk out of the pink decorated store and sit on a bench outside, pulling out my phone.
Quickly wiping the screen on my jeans, I press the home button and unlock it, seeing I have a new message from my dad. Rolling my eyes at the text that says “Should I invite your aunt Margaret to the wedding?” I don’t reply, but instead type a text to a different person.
iMessage to: Ashton
are you awake?
After about five minutes of waiting and bouncing my foot up and down, I decide to walk around since there is nothing better I can do right now. Entering Forever 21, I start looking around all the random stuff, starting from jewelry to shoes, finding a few nice things that I think I might buy. A soft tune by Twenty One Pilots is playing in the background and I quietly hum along, finding a cute pair of sneakers and looking for my size. My phone starts buzzing in my pocket and I take it out to answer it, still searching through the shoe boxes.
“Hello?” I mumble and smile when I finally spot the right size.
“Morning.” A raspy voice greets and I sit down on a chair to try on my new shoes.
“Good morning, hope I didn’t wake you up.” His morning voice is something I have heard one time before and I can say that it is very pleasing.
“It was about time I got up anyway.” He chuckles lightly and I nod, even though he can’t actually see me.
“Sorry to bother.” I mumble and slip my foot in the blue sneakers, smiling to myself. Perfect fit. “I was just bored.”
“At eleven in the morning?” His voice cracks a bit and he clears his throat.
“My mom made me tag along to the mall today, we’re shopping.” I put my sandals back on and the silly designed sneakers in their box, getting up to go pay for them.
“Why so sad? I thought girls like shopping?”
“Well this girl doesn’t.” I roll my eyes and approach the cashier, smiling at her and muttering a “hello.”
“Then why don’t you just leave?” As if I could.
“You don’t understand, if my mom takes me shopping, then we are gonna shop. There’s no going back.” I can hear him laugh on the other line as I take out my card and hand it to the girl in front of me.
“Glad I’m not a girl then.” I huff slightly, but kind of agree. “So have you talked to your dad?”
“Uh, no, not yet.” I struggle to put my wallet back in my bag while holding the phone between my shoulder and ear. “But I’ll give him a call tomorrow, don’t worry. He’s currently very stressed about the wedding invitations so I didn’t want to bother him.” I laugh lightly and thank the girl behind the counter, before taking my bag and leaving the store.
“Oh yeah, sure, no problem.” Going back towards Victoria’s Secret I see my mom also paying for the stuff she bought and I wait outside for her.
“Hey.” I suddenly think of something. “Do you want to maybe come over to my place? I’ve got a lot of books I could show you and a freezer full of ice cream.” Just thinking about ice cream makes me kind of hungry.
“You really do love ice cream.” He laughs and I just shrug, because I mean, it’s true. “Um, sure, I guess.” He sounds kind of uncertain.
“If you don’t want to, don’t worry. I’m most likely going to be home alone and I guess I wanted some company, but it’s totally fine if you have other plans.” I rush the words out, not wanting him to feel like I am pressuring him or something. It’s just that sometimes I tend to get quite lonely.
“No, no, Luna, it’s totally fine, I want to.” I smile at the reassurance and my eyes slightly widen when I see the amount of bags my mom is carrying right now. “I would love for you to introduce me to your antic books and your strange addiction for ice cream.”
“Okay.” I laugh and shift my phone to my other ear, waving at my mom when I notice her looking around most likely for me. “I’ll see you around five or six?” I suggest knowing my mom and I will most likely spend another three hours here and I will also need some time to clean around my room and unpack all the stuff we are going to buy before he arrives.
“Sure. Good luck with your shopping, Luna.” He giggles and I bite my lip to keep myself from laughing. I swear, guys giggling is the funniest thing I have ever heard. Especially this guy.
“Bye, Ashton.” I end the call and slide the phone in the back pocket of my jeans.
“I see you got yourself something.” My mom smiles slightly and I just nod, my small bag not even comparing to her already five huge bags full of items.
“I’ll have a friend come over later, if that’s okay?” I look up at her, hating the fact that she is wearing high heels, making me look like a toddler next to her.
“A friend?” Her eyebrows raise.
“Yes.” I nod. “You know, the guy I got in… trouble with, a few weeks ago.” I try not to say the word jail since I know she won’t appreciate it.
“Oh, him.” She slowly nods, licking her red stained lips. “Well if he’s your friend, of course. What’s his name?”
“Ashton.” I answer although I don’t really understand her curiosity. I mean, she’s never home so I don’t think she will ever even get to meet him.
“Ashton, sure, you two can have fun, I’ll be at the office.” She then starts walking ahead of me, already entering the next store and I sigh, following behind.
“Of course you will.” I whisper.
My feet are killing me, the white sandals I wore proving to be not so comfortable as they left some pretty bad blisters on my ankles. After taking a cold shower to try and cool down, I dress in a pair of shorts and an old shirt that I’m pretty sure used to belong to my dad. I mean, I am an AC/DC fan myself, but not that big of a fan to have a tee shirt with their logo, so it must have been his. After nicely folding all the clothes from around my room and putting them in my closet, I go over to my desk to clean all the scattered drawings and notebooks I used in the past few days, putting them in place and also opening my windows to let some fresh air in the room.
Looking around the room, I spot that in the corner some paint chipped from the wall. Last time I painted my walls was over a year ago, maybe I should do it again. The different shaped clouds look almost dull now, indicating that it is definitely time for a change. Going downstairs, I already see my mom’s car speeding away and I sigh, picking the dozens of bags she left in the living room and carrying them to her room. Why does she need so many things again? After that I just decide that I have nothing better to do with my time, so I guess I’ll just sit around, maybe watch a tv show or read a book.
I really appreciate old literature, I love me some Shakespeare and Jules Verne, or even Jane Austen. But I do like reading recent books as well. There are a lot of talented writers and sometimes I wish I had the same passion they do, but I don’t think I ever will. I enjoy art more, design, paintings, music, it’s just something I have always been drawn to. But I do love reading, fiction, romance, anything that captures my attention. I guess I have always been kind of a book nerd.
I hear the doorbell ring right as the clock hits six and I leave the book I was busying myself with, running to look out the window. Pressing the button for unlocking the gate and opening the front door, I wait for Ashton to cross the small distance to the house as he looks around at nothing in particular, probably just at the flowers or maybe the garage door, I don’t know. He smiles brightly and mutters out a soft “hello” before taking his hands out of his pockets.
“Well, come in then.” I open the door wide and wait for him to step inside.
“Do I have to like wipe my shoes or something?” He asks uncertain and steps inside, his eyes moving around the big hallway.
“Nah, just take them off. If there are any spots on the carpet, my mom will kill me.” I laugh slightly and he nods, quickly kicking his Vans off and placing them next to the other pairs that are lined against the wall. I don’t like keeping my shoes in boxes or in my closet like my mom does, I can easily just pick the pair I want this way. “Follow me and try not to get lost.” I joke and walk back towards the living room, his feet padding behind me, most likely taking my words seriously.
“Your house is…” He trails off and I raise an eyebrow.
“Big?” I guess but he shakes his head.
“Nice.” I laugh at that.
“Thanks. You want a tour?” I giggle slightly and walk towards the couch, sitting back down and turning down the volume of the music channel that was on before.
“Sure.” He nods and sits down next to me, pulling out the big and most likely uncomfortable white pillow from behind him.
“I was kidding.” I clarify and his lips part and he nods slowly.
“Oh, sure, so was I.” Shaking my head, I mark the page of the book I was previously reading and placing it on the coffee table in front of me, turning back to face Ashton.
“Seriously, do you want me to show you around? It could take us a while.” There are some parts of the house that I personally find really cool and I think he would also like them.
“Yeah, I wouldn’t mind, I mean, I don’t want to get lost while looking for the bathroom.” He chuckles and I nod, because that wouldn’t be the first time someone actually lost their way around here. Including me.
“Alright then.” I get up and pull my tee shirt a bit farther up so it doesn’t look as if I’m not wearing pants, because I hate when that happens; and he follows my actions.
“Nice shirt. I got one myself.” He comments and I smile.
“Thanks. I think it’s my dad’s.” I shrug and guide him out of the living room and up the marble stairs to the second floor. “Oh, come here, I want to show you something.” I walk quickly towards the last room down the hall.
Opening the door, I let him inside before closing it behind us. Switching the lights on, I pull back the curtains and open the balcony doors, letting some fresh air in the room that hasn’t been opened in quite a few days. Turning back around to look at Ashton, I clap my hands and smile.
“Isn’t the view just dreamy?” I sigh and indicate for him to come closer.
You can see in the distance the beach, the sun shining bright above the water. There are a lot of palm trees and beautiful shades in the skyline. Maybe he doesn’t understand it, the beauty I find in this world, nobody really understands it, but I hope he will. He gets all the things I love, starting from the beautiful designs of clouds to my love for old books and ice cream.
“It’s pretty.” He agrees and leans his body on the edge of the balcony, looking into distance.
“Oh no, don’t do that.” I grab his shoulder and pull him back a little.
“Why, is it like not stable?” He frowns and I shake my head.
“No, no, it’s not that.” I don’t know how to explain this to him. “It’s just that, I don’t like it when people get that close to the edge, it’s kind of dangerous. I mean, look down.” I gaze down at the bushes of roses. “You lean a few more inches and you might fall and die.”
“You’re not gonna die.” He laughs. “It’s only like five or six meters.”
“That is a lot.” I shake my head and pull him back a few more steps.
“Okay, okay, whatever makes you feel safe.” He smiles and I nod, before slowly walking back inside.
“I just like the view, that is one of the only reasons I come out here.” Stepping inside, I point in a different corner of the room. “That’s the other reason.”
The big piano has collected a bit of dust and also has some papers scattered on top of it, from the last time I was in here. There is a drawer full of other songs and notes in it right behind it, that I have saved along the years.
“You play?” He questions surprised and walks towards the big instrument, sitting down on the bench in front of it, lightly touching the keys.
“Used to.” I shrug. “I still do, sometimes. But not as often as I did before.” Sitting down next to him, I gather the papers on top of the piano and place them in a pile.
“What can you play?” He questions and I chuckle lightly.
“I prefer Beethoven.” He nods smiling.
“Okay then, show me something.” I shake my head.
“A sonata is at least fifteen minutes long, I don’t think I even remember them that well.” He just ignores me and takes my hands in his, pressing them on the keys.
“Try.” He whispers and I have to shake away the feeling of his warm skin on mine before I might actually start shivering.
“Okay.” I nod and look at him for a few more moments, before going through the pile of papers knowing I have it in there. And there it is, the notes to “Moonlight Sonata” laid perfectly. I place it in front of me and sigh deeply, before pressing down onto the keys.
It all comes back to me, the music just flows so naturally and every note fits perfectly next to the other. It’s like I didn’t even stop playing so long ago, but to be honest, every time I get the chance I do try and rehearse this melody, because it is just way to beautiful to be forgotten. Of course, I don’t remember all of it, but the first part of the song goes extremely casual and I love the fact that I can still remember something I learned so many years ago. I don’t want to bore Ashton too much, so I believe that just the first movement out of the three, which is about five minutes, is just fine. I mean, I told him the whole sonata is pretty long.
Even though I could continue, my fingers dancing on top of the keys lightly, I stop because I know I might not do so if I get way too into it. The sound of a piano is something that always makes me quite emotional, just thinking on how is has impacted my life and so many other people’s lives, it’s just magical. There is something about it, it gives away a unique sensation, almost like a high, which makes me feel happier each and every time.
Clearing my throat I move my fingers away from the keys after pressing the final note and place my hands in my lap. Looking up at Ashton, his eyebrows are furrowed, but his lips are parted, the rest of his face seeming extremely relaxed.
“Why’d you stop?” He questions.
“I told you, it’s long, I only played a part of it.” I shrug and he nods slowly.
“That was amazing. Really beautiful, Luna.” My cheeks heat up and I look down again at the keys.
“Thanks.” I mumble and then sigh. “Okay, let’s go, we’ve been in here for a while.”
After showing Ashton around, we decided to go downstairs in the kitchen so I could get us some ice cream before we went to my room and I showed him some of my favorite books. Opening the freezer, I take out all the different flavors I can find and place them on the table.
“Okay, what would you like?” He smiles at the crazy amount of ice cream I have taken out and shakes his head slightly.
“I think you might develop a health problem if you keep eating this much sugar on the daily.” I just shrug, because he’s most likely right, but I couldn’t be bothered by it. “I’ll have vanilla.”
“That’s boring.” I roll my eyes and take out two bowls.
“I like it simple.” He giggles.
I choose three different flavors and my bowl looks a lot more colorful than Ashton’s. After getting two spoons I hand him his and we walk back up the stairs to my room. I haven’t shown him only two places in the house; my room and the laundry room. It’s actually a very nice place, it smells fresh and it has some nice varieties of detergents. Opening my bedroom door, I walk straight to my bed and take a seat, bringing my knees up to my chest and taking a spoonful of my dessert, enjoying the pistachio flavor.
“I like your walls.” He points at the clouds I have painted a year ago and I nod.
“Yeah, I really need to repaint them. The color started to flake off.” He sits down on the other side of the bed keeps looking around.
“Oh, you like My Chemical Romance?” He questions, spotting the few posters above my desk.
“And Fall Out Boy.”
“I like a lot of bands.” I nod.
“Such as?” He questions and looks back at me but I just shrug. “Right, that damn riddle.”
“Sorry, but not sorry.” I giggle and continue eating my ice cream.
“And that poster?” He asks and looks right above my bed at the huge poster that I had custom made a few years ago.
“That, my dear friend Ashton.” I put my bowl on my night stand and smile big. “Is Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany’s.” I explain turning around to look at him. “The most beautiful and classic romantic comedy of all time.”
“Your favorite movie?” He tilts his head to the side smiling.
“Maybe.” I smile back and sigh looking up at the beautiful poster.
“I’ve never seen it.” He suddenly confesses and I turn around shocked.
“Impossible.” I shake my head. “You spent eighteen years of your life clueless about this masterpiece?”
“Seventeen and eleven months.” He corrects me but I ignore his comment.
“I cannot accept that.” I quickly get up from my bed and walk towards the other side of the room.
Looking through the large amount of books, I finally get the one I was looking for. Wiping the small amount of dust that has settled on it, I inspect it for a few moments, fixing the corners that have slightly bent. Walking back towards Ashton, I hand him the orange covered book and dismiss his frown.
“Breakfast at Tiffany’s, by Truman Capote. You have to read it.”
“I thought it was a movie.” I roll my eyes.
“Yes, it is also a movie, but how do you think that movies are made?” I ask rhetorically and he shrugs confused. “After books, dummy.” I clarify and his mouth parts in realization.
“Yes, of course.” He laughs slightly. “But why can’t I just watch the movie?”
“Because.” I huff. “First you read the book, then you watch the movie. It’s like a rule, you can’t break it.”
“Okay, okay.” He raises his arms in surrender. “I’ll read it, if it makes you happy. I promise.” I nod content and get my ice cream bowl back.
“Now, tell me what your favorite movie is.”
After getting about three more refills of ice cream (for me, Ashton didn’t want any more, but it’s his loss, I guess) and finding out his favorite movie, The Pursuit of Happiness, which I have yet to watch, and other random facts about him, it had now gotten dark outside and we have discussed a ton of books. I made a small pile of books for him, which he has to read because they are really good, such as Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen or The Fault In Our Stars by John Green.
“Aren’t you hungry?” I ask when I see it is almost nine o’clock. “I mean, I ate a lot of ice cream, but you didn’t.” I get up from my spot on the bed where we have been laying for a couple hours and open the door to walk downstairs.
“Actually, yes.” He follows behind me. “I was going to say something, but then again you got distracted by your books.” I guess he’s right.
We go downstairs in the kitchen and I open some cabinets, looking for something that we could actually eat. There is a lot of cereal and granola bars, but none of them are something Ashton nor I want right now. I tell him to check different drawers while I go in the fridge. Great, my mom and I went clothing shopping today, but we forgot about groceries.
“I could do some Pop Tarts.” Ashton says and pulls out a box of cookies and cream Pop Tarts.
“Sure.” I nod and close the fridge as he opens the box. “Are you one of those people that toasts them?” I scrunch up my nose.
“Sometimes.” He shrugs.
“Well, don’t, they’re better as they are.” Opening one I take a bite and sit down on a chair, Ashton taking a seat next to me.
“I like your hair.” He comments and I frown.
“Why? It’s always messy.” I run my fingers through it, proving my point as they get stuck in the tangles.
“Exactly.” He smiles with a mouth full and I almost cringe.
“Don’t talk with your mouth full, please.” He rolls his eyes but doesn’t speak.
“Can I tell you a riddle?” He asks and wipes his mouth.
“Sure.” I laugh.
“Mary’s dad had five daughters, the first one was called-“ I stop him before he can even finish.
“The fifth daughter is Mary.” I roll my eyes and he scoffs.
“You didn’t even let me finish.” He takes another bite of his Pop Tart and mumbles under his breath. “Rude.”
“It was predictable.” I shrug my shoulders and get up to throw away the wrappers from the table. “Come on, there is one more place in this house I would like to show you.” I tug his hand and he quickly stuffs the food into his mouth, before following me.
Running up the stairs and climbing into the attic, I can hear Ashton panting beside me, probably from coming all the way up here. The only light in the room comes from the moon that is now up in the sky. I walk towards the other side of the room and move a chair in front of me, climbing it and opening the skyline window, propping myself up on the edge.
“Are you coming or staying?” I ask Ashton who is still in the doorway. He nods quickly and walks towards me.
“Are you sure this is safe?” He grunts also climbing up on the chair and looking outside.
“Of course.” I step out and sit down on the edge of the rooftop, admiring the beautiful Los Angeles night sky.
I hear him hissing in pain, probably banging his head against the window, which had also happened to me a few times before. After struggling to get up next to me, he just sits for a few moments and catches his breath. You can see all the way to Downtown LA from here. It is beautiful. All the city lights and tall buildings illuminating the whole city. It is something that I have always admired, how quiet it looks from a distance, even though it is one of the loudest places. But from up here all the people seem irrelevant, the only thing that matters is the colorful lights dancing around, almost reflecting in the dark skyline.
“It’s pretty.” Ashton mutters from beside me.
“It is magical.” I sigh and bring my knees up to my chest, gazing into distance.
“How comes you’re not afraid of falling from up here?” He questions.
“Because I can’t see the ground. It feels as if I am above the world, but there is also nothing down there that could hurt me.” My answer comes out easily.
“Are you afraid of heights?” I shrug.
“Maybe. I don’t like seeing the ground and not being able to touch it. That’s why I never look down.” I glance back at him and see how beautiful the moonlight reflects into his eyes. He just nods.
“There is a full moon tonight.” I look up to the sky and point at the beautiful moon. “It’s pretty.”
“So are the stars.” He comments.
“I don’t like them.” I shake my head and look at my socks, twisting the white cotton between my fingers.
“Why not?” I don’t even have to look at him to know he is frowning.
“They only hold lies.” I whisper and he leans a bit closer to the edge, but I grip his arm and look up at him. “Don’t.”
“Sorry.” He mumbles and comes closer to me, his shoulder brushing against mine. “But what makes you believe that?” I sigh.
“It’s a complicated story.” I shake my head.
“I like complicated things.” I can almost hear the smile in his voice. “Try me.” He’s just way too cute to handle.
“My dad chose a star for me when I was little.” I decide on just explaining my reason to him, instead of dodging the subject. “It used to be my lucky star.” I smile and lean my head on my knee. “Every night we would look up at the sky and make a wish upon it. They proved to come true most of the time.” Thinking about it, I know my wishes as a kid were kind of silly. “And then the night my parents separated, I tried to find the star. I wished it would bring them back together.” I bite my lip and look up at the sky. “It died the very next day.” I shake my head. “It fell into oblivion and took away all my wishes.” Looking into Ashton’s eyes, I concentrate onto his beautiful green orbs instead of the ugly memory. “That’s the day I lost all my belief in wishing upon a star.” I laugh without humor. “There is no such thing.”
We sit in silence, goosebumps rising on my skin from the chilly summer air surrounding us. I wrap my arms around my knees to try and keep warm. The wind blows away the wild hair from my face and I close my eyes, trying again for what feels like the millionth time to wipe away the memory of the falling star. Suddenly Ashton’s arm wraps around my waist, his warm flannel now coming around my body as well. He tugs me closer and I lean into his side, placing my head onto his shoulder.
“I don’t know how a girl like you can hate the stars.” He whispers, his warm breath fanning over the side of my head.
“A girl like me?” I frown at the comment.
“Your eyes, Luna.” He says and I look up at him, propping my chin onto his shoulder.
“They’re blue?” I ask confused and he shakes his head, looking deeply into my eyes almost as if he is awestruck.
“They hold galaxies in them.” He whispers softly and my breathing stops for a moment. “There is a beautiful skyline above us, full of constellations, but the only stars I can gaze into are the ones in your eyes.” I swallow hard and blink slowly, taking in his words. ”I can’t relate to your story, but I am asking only one thing of you.” He slowly brushes a few strands of hair out of my face with shaky fingers. “Never hold hatred for the galaxies inside your eyes.”
Slowly prying my gaze away from his, I look away towards the city and think about what he had just said. I don’t even know how I should feel. I am just… overwhelmed. Never have I thought so highly about something as simple about me as my eyes. I guess he just points out random things about me as I do about him. I lean back into his side and hide my face in the warm material of his flannel, sighing upon feeling the beautiful scent of his cologne.
“I won’t.”
@FadingLogic
thank you so much!! x
4/24/17