Fangirl

I sit on my hotel bed while Max has already left to go goof off with Ashton. I'm just staring at my hands, remembering the sad look on Luke's face when I told him. Damn it, I shouldn't have let Michael get in my head like that! I kick the edge of my bed, and sit on the floor instead.

"Hey Riley, what's up?"

"Hi uh," I look around the room, "Why didn't anyone tell me about Amy?" Michael's eyes widen and he walks over to me.

"What about Amy?"

"That Luke isn't actually dating her.."

"Management told us not to." He shrugs, and I nod slowly. Someone should have told me sooner though, I've been beating myself up about Luke for way too long. "You aren't going to like, date Luke though, right?"

"I don't know." I shrug.

"Riley, don't." He shakes his head. I frown.

"Why not?"

I clench my fists. I shouldn't have listened to him.

"It wouldn't be good for him." Michael says. I frown harder. "I mean you see how nervous he gets on stage and in public. He has that anxiety thing you do he just doesn't say anything about it. Imagine how much harder fame would be for him if he had to constantly keep an eye on you to make sure fans didn't pull you aside to ask you a bunch of questions? Or how exhausting it'd be for him to have everyone taking pictures of you to all the time and gossiping. You get it, right? Luke just isn't in the position to handle a real relationship. That's why he's with Amy." Michael explains.

"Uh... R-Right..." I stutter.

Okay sure, maybe it would have been tricky, but we could make it work. It's so fucking obvious we both like each other, I could've made it work.

"Hey Riley," Max walks in, giggling.

"Hey, how was it?"

"Fun. We just walked around the city and laughed about everything and it was.. Great." She smiles.

"I still ship you two."

"Riley, god, stop," She laughs, "He's four years older than me. Like with Calum it wasn't that huge of a deal, but Ashton could be-"

"Your brother, I know, I know." I sigh.

"So how'd it go with Luke?" She asks. "Did you let him down easy?"

"Unfortunately." I huff.

"Huh?"

"I like Luke, Max. I love Luke, and I keep messing it up."

"Okay, no, you don't keep messing it up, his fame keeps messing it up. And by his fame, I mean Amy."

"But this time we could've been together and I fucked it up!"

"No Riley, we both knew the second you started dating him, management would mess it all up for you guys and turn it into Luke cheating on Amy and you and Amy hating each other after Luke and her's breakup." I keep forgetting she still doesn't know Amy isn't really with Luke.

"Right." I mumble.

Notes