ALWAYS

It was two days until Gemma's wedding. Harry and I barely had anytime to talk since we were both running around like crazy people trying to get everything done for Darcy and Gemma. I spent most of my time with Anne finalizing the plans for Gemma's rehearsal dinner and getting the things I needed for Darcy. Harry was spending a majority of his time with his dad and his soon to be brother in law. When he got home all of his attention was on our child. I didn't mind that he wanted Darcy to know she was his main concern but all the talk of us being together again got put on hold. I knew we were both stressed out but at the same time, we could find the time to talk and work it out. I noticed that he had been texting a lot as well, probably talking to Aubrey. I was afraid that my antics of not liking her actually pushed him into her arms.
"Harry! Harry!" I called out to him as I struggled to get in the front door with all of the things Anne asked me to hang onto and Darcy. He came running down the stairs, shirtless and looking panicked.
"What? What's wrong?" He was obviously flustered.
"Can you help me please?" I asked trying to keep the bags in my hands and hold onto Darcy. Harry smiled and nodded. HE took a few bags from me then sauntered into the kitchen with them. I moved Darcy further into the house. "Go play in your room until it's time for dinner baby." I instructed her with a kind smile. Darcy beamed then ran up to her room. I closed the front door with my foot then went to the kitchen as well. Harry stood at the counter looking through all of the bags.
"What is all of this stuff for?" Harry asked holding up a feather boa.
"It's for Gem's bachelorette party tonight. Your mother and Tracy were insiting that I keep it so I can't get out of going." I answered.
Harry laughed, "Nick's is tomorrow after rehearsal dinner. Gemma said they planned it that way so neither of us would have an excuse not to go. Sneaky jerks."
I shook my head, "I really don't want to go."
"Why not?" Harry looked upset by my statement.
I shrugged, "Not my thing. I'm not one for really going out anymore. Getting pass out drunk is not my idea of fun anymore, especially since I am a mother. Plus, Gemma wants me to make friends with all of her friends and I just...I am not like them."
Harry smiled and took my hand, "You're not like anyone I have ever met." He pulled my body against his and wrapped his arms around my waist. I smiled liking the feel of his naked chest underneath my hands. I bit my lip as I gazed into his eyes. "I'm sorry that we haven't been talking a whole lot this week. It's been crazy and I know you can take a little bit of silence where Darcy can't. I don't ever want her to think that I am ignoring her." I lifted my eyebrow at him. "Not that I am ignoring you. To be honest I was a little bit creepy last night." I smirked. I knew exactly what he was talking about. He had been sneaky, coming into my room around two in the morning just to sit on my bed and watch me sleep. He woke me up for a few moments but I played it off like I didn't even see him. "I really wish that this week hadn't been a blur. I really need to tell you something." Harry began. I nodded waiting for him to say what he needed. "I invited Aubrey to Gemma's wedding." He stated quietly. My heart sank. My stomach did the bad kind of flips. He did what? "I really want you to meet her and see that I don't care for her the way I care for you. You are my moon and stars." He murmured. I didn't care. I didn't want her around my child. "I can tell that you are mad. So I am going to go check on Darcy and let you sort yourself out." Harry attempted to kiss my forehead but I backed away from him. He sighed heavily then walked out of the room. I wanted to scream or hit something. All this time telling me that he wants me but he invites the teenager to his sister's wedding. I knew that I was already invited but his daughter and I were supposed to be his date. I reached into the bags that Anne had given me and I pulled out the things I needed to make the drinks for the night. I texted Gemma to tell her that I was definitely coming and to have a little extra alcohol. I was seeing red. I wanted to forget about Harry and whatever was going on with Aubrey, so I was going to get blackout drunk.


I sat between Gemma and the wall at the bar we were currently in. We'd been to two others already and I was already tipsy. I was laughing at everyone's jokes no matter how terrible and I was loving everyone I was with.
"So, E, can I ask you what is going on between you and my brother since you are so loose?" Gemma giggled handing me another drink. I shrugged. "Okay, so what's going on with you and my brother?" Gemma asked.
"He's being a baby about having sex with me. It's pissing me off." I replied bluntly. Gemma looked a bit shocked. "Do you know how many times I've tried to get him into the bedroom?" Gemma chuckled and shook her head. "Like, a million but either someone interrupts or he's all, "no, baby. you're upset" or "no baby, you're too tired" or my favorite: "baby, Darcy is down the hall". God, she's four! She's not going to know what we're doing!" I complained at Gemma and her friends.
Tracy laughed, "Sounds like Darcy needs a weekend with Grammy and Robin."
I rolled my eyes, "That's what I am thinking. I'm freaking dying here. He is all I fucking want and he acts like I am a child who has no idea." I took a gulp of my drink. "But then again, he could be getting it from Aubrey." I mocked her with the way I said her name.
Gemma frowned, "I don't like that he invited her to the wedding. I know it's to prove a point to you and all but still, I think it is rude because Mum, Robin and I all love you so much. I know he swears that she is just his friend but that's not how she sees it."
I shrugged, "Yeah, we'll see about that. I'm like so tempted to move out because being in the same house but not in the same bed is driving me nuts. I want to be with him. We talked about having a family all those years ago in Paris but now it's like we can't expand this family if you're talking to someone else and not getting it in." Gemma and her friends were laughing really hard at me. I sighed and downed my drink. I leaned my head back on the booth we were sitting in and tried to control the tears that I wanted to let go of. I knew that part of the reason Harry was so...responsible when it came to being physical was my fault. I had told him that I needed it to be real. But how else was I supposed to feel when I tried so hard to get away from Charles to be with him, only to have him tell me to get out. I inhaled deeply and choked back all of my emotions. I stood from the booth quickly.
"E, where are you going?" Gemma asked with concern.
"Get another drink." I replied. She nodded but there was worry creeping up in her eyes. "It's a party right?" I stated with a shrug. Gemma didn't reply. I leaned over and kissed her forehead. "I'm fine. Really." Gemma sighed and nodded. I was aware that she didn't believe me but I didn't want to be the downer of the group. So, I was just going to drink the problem away. Not my finest idea. But I didn't want to think about how I was unintentionally pushing the man I was in love with into the arms of someone else.

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