Save Me From Myself

Charlie's pov

Ashton has no fucking idea what i have been through so why is he judgmental. All he meet me is for one day and he already is calling me a bitch. Well I think that luke is just covering up Ashtons ass so they don't get any bad media.

I wonder what its like to be an Ocean. What it is like to end up on a different beach every day. What it is like to be free and beautiful and have everyone love you. What it is like to push in and out every day, like breathing without it hurting . With out it feeling like you're drowning everyday.

I grabbed the exacto knife i had gotten for "crafts". I clicked it up and down for awhile. What was going through lukes head when he saw the blood that wasnt yet stopped coming from my wrists. I wonder if he will tell my Aunt. I bet ya she will send me to a Mental Institution if she finds out. God i can only think of all the shit luke is now saying about me.

I wish i could feel something. I want to feel. But all i get is numbness, well i guess thats what you get for actually letting people get to you and let people get close to you. I push the knife out and roll my sleeves up and bracelets up also. I swipe fast over my wrist. I do it again about 4 other times. I looked at my wrist there is little beads of blood making their way to the surface. I rub the blood off and go to my closet to grab my towel. I hold it to my wrist and wait for the blood to go away. I roll my sleeve down and grab my phone. I put some nicklebackon and go to bed.

Notes