Kryptonite

I was about 17 when I met this girl. Her name was Ryan. We were invited to some after party after some award show, can't remember what though. I had just turned seventeen, the band's career was only up for maybe a year or so.

Ryan was the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen. You could tell she was Florida, where I was at the time, because her skin was golden from the sun, but yet from her own pigment at the same time.

Her long blonde hair was blowing in the wind, the party was outside, and her perfume scent traveled all over the place, and to me. I thought it was fate at the time, until I went to talk to her.

''I'm Harry.'' I had said. ''Ryan.''She mumbles. ''Why are you here?''I asked. ''Excuse you?"she said, seriously. ''I meant..you don't look like..ya know..a singer or whatever.''I mumble, regretting ever going over there.

''My dad owns this venue, you asshole.''She spats. ''I'm sorry..I'm Harry, by the way.''I said, holding out my hand. I lowered it after I knew she wasn't gonna dare touch me. ''Good for you.''She says, fakely.

''You look pretty.''I say.''Shut up.''She demands and I nod. She looked over at me, smirked, then pulled me closer, putting her arm around my neck. ''I gotta a place we could go...if you want a little fun for the night.''She whispered.''Okay..''

The sex I gave her was great, for both of us. We done it about three times, over and over again with out stopping. I was hoping for more, but she said she was feeling sore. So I stayed that night with her. We talked and talked and talked about every thing under the sun.

I knew everything about her, she knew all my details too. In the end, though, I had spent almost a week with that girl before we were forced to go back to London. I promised I'd call as much as I could, she liked that promise.

I remember staying with her every night we were there. She'd wake up in the morning, her hair a mess.. her make up from the previous day smudged around her eyes and on her cheeks. My shirt on her, nothing else but panties.

My favorite part was waking up to her voice saying, "Get up Cuddle Bug, its late and you don't need to sleep all day.'' I loved that. I'd call her every night for about a nothing week just to hear her call me Cuddle Bug, I loved it..

But I also remember the Skype call we made almost a week later from the day I left. She had said. "Harry, you need to fly here now.'' ''Why babe? Everything okay? Do you just need to see Cuddle Bug?''I had smiled at the time.

''No, Harry.''She said.''I'm..pr-pregnant...and its your-your's.''Ryan stuttered. I was in the same room as Niall at the time, he was the only one that knew for about a month. I flew to Florida as much as possible to see Ryan, make sure she was okay. And I flew two days before every hospitial visit she had, I wanted to be there for her.

I remember screaming one night to myself as I lied in the bed, I was with Ryan. I yelled..

"You fucking Whore! You should've just keep your junk to yourself! Damn it I hate myself! I runied Ryan's life! I ruined my life! I can't raise a kid! I'm only fucking seventeen!'' But Ryan calmed me down and said a few things

"Harry, our lives aren't ruined..some day soon you're gonna be a Daddy..and you'll get to hear your little girl cry at night, then you have to go check on her, then knowing you probably sing to her..and every thing would be okay.''

I wish I never went to that Afterparty. I only ruined two lives. Ryan's because I was horrible to. That first week I was with her, we had sex every possible moment. I caused her more pain than we figured.

And Janie's.. because I'm not always there for her like I wanna be....

And trust me, I wanna be.

Janie's smile makes me weak. Her life fills me with joy, then pushes me off a tall building. Her tears inable me to wipe the pain away, but drown in my own. My daughter deserved a better life that what she has...and damn it.. I want her to have a good one.

Even if I die Trying to make it happen.

Notes

I will update soon, please comment. POINTERS/HINTS:More drama besides that little flashback, you might like it as long as you can handle some tears here and there, your own tears that is :'(

comment your thoughts on it so far! You like?
I will update soon, love you guys so much!
thanks for reading!