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suffocated.

Here comes the Heartbreak

Harry~

Flash back--

I can't believe i'm going to do this. I take a few deep breaths and reach into my pocket for the small velvet box that I oh so carefully hid from Alfie. here we go.
"Alfie, I love you so much. You are all I think about, when I wake up, when I go to bed, when i'm putting on my shoes. You have changed my life so much.
I am a better person sense you entered my life and I am grateful that someone as sweet as you agreed to be with someone like me."
Alfie had tears of joy welling up in his eyes.
I open the ring box and place it on the table. His eyes glowed with excitement and a huge smile came across his face
"Alfie, when you told me about the nightmare you had last month it made me realize something.
that Life is too short to wait for everything. I love you so much and I want to be with you forever.
I know we have only been together for a couple of months but Alfie James Lachlan, will you marry me??"
Alfie's smile dissapears as tears off sadness cover his face.
"I.....I can't"
What did he just say. A single tears streams down my face.
He gets out of his seat and starts heading towards the door, and befor I can say a word he is gone Leaving me by myself at the table with a ring with no finger in it and a small puddle of my tears.

Why would he do this to me?


End of Flash back--

-----------------------------
2 weeks later
-----------------------------

I havn't talked to Alfie since he walked out on me 2 weeks ago.
I still don't understand why he left. I thought he loved me. I thought he cared, but I guess it was all a lie.
I poured my heart out to him. I shared stuff with him that I havn't even told Zayn or Niall.
Jake probabaly doesnt even exist. Alfie probabaly made him up so I would fall harder for him .
He played my like a chess piece. And I fell for it.
I thought he was some great guy, but turns out he was just a big joke.
What made him pick me? Why did I diserve to be humiliated? How many other guys has he done this to?
He was my first everything.
My first love, my first boyfriend, he took my virginity for goodness sake.
He played with my emotions and I just fell for his little game.
I have never fell so alone in my life.
He was the love of my life and He wasnt even real.
He was the one thing in life that woke up every day for and now he's gone.
What do I have to live for ? Nothing,
Without even thinking my hand found their way to the knife droor.
I opened it to see the sharp steel blades.
I picked up the biggest one.
I looked at it for what felt like an hour as i slowly raised it to my wrist.
My heart started racing as I dug the blade slowly into my wrist.
It hurt so much, but the pain in my heart numbed out the pain in my wrist.
I dug deeper and deeper until I could almost see bone.
My vision is getting blurrier by the second.
The only thoughts in my head are of Alfie. How he betrayed me, how he humiliated me, and made a fool out of me.
The room started spinning and the air grew thick and heavy.
I am almost free of the pain and the betrayal. I can see the light.

"OH MY GOD HARRY!!!!!!"
"alfie???"

--------------------
5 days later
--------------------

I woke up to a flash of bright light.
"Alfie??" I say with a tired voice.
As much as I wanted it to be Alfie, it was the boys.
Zayn was on my right holding my hand, Niall was next to him rubbing his shoulder, Liam and Louis are on my left
"Where am I? What happened? Is Alfie here?!"
"HARRY!!!" Zayn yells as all the boys tackle me in a group hug.
"what is going on??" I as again.
The boys sit back down.
"um... well....Harry y-you..um... tried to harm yourself." Zayn spoke.
My eyes widened while my mind flooded with memories of that terrible day.
"why?" Niall asked. I have never heard im sound so serious befor.
I muster up all of my courage to answer him as tears start running down my cheaks.
"Alfie." They all ghasp.
"W-what? i thought you love eachother, what happened?" zayn says with anger behind his voice.
I tell them everything.
"About 3 weeks ago I proposed." Fresh tears arepopping from my eyes. The guys all look thoroughly confused.
"H-he S-said n-no." Zayn jumps out of his seat.
"Where is that son of a Bitch???!!! No one treats my best friend like that!"
"I don't know. I havn't seen him or talked to him since he walked out on me." Zayn sits back down.
"I thought I had lost my will for living, but sitting here with you guys is making remember the good things about life. thank you."
We all go i for another group hug which is inerupted by a knock at the door. It's the nurse.
"There is someone here to see you." She says with a cheery voice.
Acurly headed boy steps into the doorway. He looks pale and skinnier the usual.
"Alfie?" I say with fear beind my voice.
All the boys stand up and guard my bed from him.
"Can we talk?" Alfie says looking at the ground.
the boys turn to look at me for an answer and I nod.
They leave not befor each of them manage to shove or push Alfie as the walk past him.
"Harry im so so....." I interupt him
"I don't care about your apologies, but I do diserve an explanation."
He looks up at me from the ground and I see his green eyes are filled with sorrow.
"I....." He begins to speak his side of the story.
Here comes the heartbreak.

Notes

This chapter touches on a really serious topic. Suiced is never the answer. It may seem like it at the time It will only make things worse.
My cousin tried commiting suicide twice. he thought that he wasn't worthy of life. But he was. I love him so much. Our family cares so much about him. It has been about 8 months and he is doing better now.

there is always a silver lining in a sky that might seem completely black.

On that note I hope you enjoyed this chapter and felt a connection to it like I did. Please subscribe and vote.
Please leave comments down below about how this chapter made you feel or if you want some advice on how to handle yourself or someone you know who is having suicidal thoughts, I might be able to help since I have whitnesed it first hand.

Comments

@Kiki_loves_niall
aww thanks I didn't know anyone was still reading it. Could you please read my story Visiting Hours?? It's soooooooo much better

Woah this story has a lot of twist and turns one moment I am squealing and the next I am cring

@llznh_loveforever
HEYY I just posted your One Shot!! I really hope you like it!! here is the link
http://www.onedirectionfanfiction.org/Story/22124/1D-1SHOTS/

ENJOY!!!!!

@give me time and a crayon
have you seen your one shot yet??