I felt a tap on my shoulder and slowly woke up. Harry was lying next to me, his curly hair a mess and his smile warm.

“Morning, babe. I hate to be a prick, but I have to leave for work in 15 minutes. You’re more than welcome to stay here and sleep. I won’t be back til after lunch, though.” I took in this information as I still tried to get my eyes adjusted to the light. As I stretched my arms over my head, I turned and saw it was 7 in the morning. Was this some sort of sick joke?

“I’ll go home,” I mumbled as I pushed the covers off of me and sat up. It would be nice to go home. Ever since the gang fight at the party last week, I’ve been sleeping over at Harry’s. Rusty was always with Derek, and I hated to be alone. Especially with a crazy drug dealer after me.

“I’ll drop you off.” He came over and kissed my cheek before walking into the bathroom to get ready.

As I walked around the massive bedroom, I smiled at myself. This was probably the most fucked up situation I had ever been in. Drugs, gangs, famous pop stars…what the fuck was I doing with my life? I laughed to myself as I put on my clothes because, in all honesty, it’s not like I wasn’t happy. I wasn’t jumping off the walls with joy, but I also wasn’t completely depressed. It was a good medium, and hopefully things would get better. Harry had Zimba’s cousin keep a close tab on all things Bones, and apparently they had issues with their suppliers to focus on more than me. Plus the police were closing in on their deals, which meant possible imprisonment for the better known members, which included Fish. I was still shocked with the fact that one of Harry’s bandmates had family in a fucking gang…but who was I to judge? It helped me a lot, and I was grateful for it.

“Ready?” Harry asked as he came out of the bathroom with his hair still wet. He was wearing black jeans that were tighter than tight, with holes around the knees. On his chest was a beat-up wife beater underneath a red plaid button-down. And he was wearing one of those ridiculous headbands he loved. Annoyed, I walked over and tore it right off his head.

“For someone with so much money, you sure dress like a bum.” I ruffled his hair with my hands so it looked effortlessly messy instead of just messy. He smiled as I took care him, and I saw his eyes twinkle.

“Thanks, Toni. What would I do without you?” He teased and I pinched his nipples. Jumping back from the pain, he cried and rubbed at his now sore pecks.

“I’m just trying to help you, pretty boy. No one likes a smelly loser as a sex icon.” I winked and he ran over and tackled me onto the bed. He hovered over me as we lay there, his smile wider than ever.

“I can’t wait til I get back.” He licked his lips and looked me up and down. I planted a sloppy kiss on his face and pushed him off of me.

“You’re assuming I’m coming back…” I said nonchalantly as I raced out the door, Harry chasing after me.

------

My flat was empty when I arrived home. There wasn’t a sound throughout the broad place, and right away I wanted to leave. But, seeing as how Harry had to be a little fame-whore, I was stuck sitting at home alone. I walked into my bedroom and dropped my purse on the bed. Fuck, I had only slept in this bed once the entire time I lived here. Maybe I should start paying Harry rent.

Walking into my bathroom, I turned on the shower and stared at my naked body in the mirror. My thighs were definitely larger than before, and my boobs felt a bit bigger, too. I know most girls would cry at this fact, but I kind of liked it. I was always so skinny because all I did was drugs, but now I kind of had a life. Making sure the water was extra hot, I jumped into the shower and enjoyed the steam. After washing my hair with my favorite shampoo and lathering myself in the best vanilla body wash, I decided it was good to be home. I should be happy. I was happy. Wasn’t I?

I rinsed myself off and didn’t bother throwing a towel around myself. When I opened the door to my wardrobe, I felt a bit of nostalgia. There were tons of clothes I paid for with stolen credit cards. Flipping through the hangers, I smiled as I recalled which credit card bought which outfit. Part of me wished I still acted like the rebel I was, but then again part of me was happy I had matured. Shaking away my thoughts, I threw on a Burberry jumper and trousers a nice bloke named Frank bought me and blow-dried my hair.

After I was all dolled-up, I sat in my living room. We had a large television, but I had no idea what bloody remote went to what so I just stared at the black screen. Trying to think of what I could do, I remembered Matt had Thursdays off from work. Grabbing my purse and keys, I was out the door to reunite with my gay best friend.

As I pulled up to the familiar stone building, I was surprised to see Matt packing up his car. I quickly turned off my vehicle and ran over to him, nearly getting run over by a stupid fucking Bimmer.

“Matty! What’s happening?” I jogged up to him as he mindlessly grabbed bags from his house and loaded them into his car.

“Toni? What are you doing here?” As he noticed me he snatched my arm and dragged me inside.

“I missed you, silly! Are you going on holiday?” I looked around his place and began to notice how empty it was. The furniture was almost all gone, safe for my favorite black leather sofa.

“No, I’m not going on holiday, Toni. I’m moving. To the States.” What. I stared at him blankly as he shuffled his feet. Moving? What the fuck?

“Are you fucking joking or something? Matt you barely moved in here a month ago.”

“I know, but I can’t do this anymore. I’m fucking terrified, Toni. I can’t leave my house without covering my face and sprinting to my car. Fuck, half the time I’m afraid to start my car because what if they did something to it? I’m paranoid.” He started to pace around the room as I tried to figure out what he was afraid of. The Bones?

“Wait, Matt, why would the Bones do anything to you? You aren’t the one who punched them.” I smiled to myself as I remembered my heroism.

“That doesn’t matter. You see what they did to Poppy. They never even fucking met her that night. I can’t take a chance like that, Toni. I’m lucky they don’t know I live next door…unless they already do know. This isn’t how I wanted to live – afraid to take a piss in my own loo? It’s not right.” He carried another bag out to his car. Before I left to follow him, I saw it was his last one.

“Matt, I can help you! Harry has –“

“No, Toni. I’m leaving. I’m leaving to stay with my sister in America for a while. It’s not permanent…but it might be. I need to get out of here…I need to save myself. I’m scared for my life here.” He sighed as he threw the last case in and closed the trunk. He then walked over to me and engulfed me in a hug. “I’ll never forget you, Toni. You’re the sassiest, sexiest woman I’ve ever laid eyes on. Know that I love you and will think of you every day. Have fun with Harry and for God’s sake…be careful.” He kissed my forehead and then sat in his vehicle, driving away without waving goodbye. I waited until he turned onto the next street before I collapsed in tears.