I stared at the coffee cup a while longer. Live! With Kelly and Michael came on the TV and I listened to them joke about current events. Hearing the name ‘One Direction,’ I turned in my chair to watch the show.

“One Direction has announced they will be releasing a fourth album in the coming months. You’re a fan, aren’t you, Michael?” The audience laughed while Michael Strahan stuck out his tongue. “Oh, come on! You don’t know you’re beautiful, Michael. And that – is what makes you beautiful.” The co-hosts laughed at each other while I turned back towards my kitchen table.

I grabbed the stick that I had lying besides my cell phone. Positive, it read. Positive that I was in deep shit? Positive that I was in over my head? Positive that I couldn’t handle this kind of pressure? All of the above, plus the fact that I was positively pregnant. Thinking back on it, I could see my mistake. It was the stupid car sex on my birthday that was the only un-safe sex Niall and I had ever had. I was too drunk to remember I wasn’t on birth control, and I never made Niall wear a condom. Big fucking mistake on my part. And after last night…I couldn’t tell him. I had no clue how he would react, and he was just getting over his last depression so I didn’t want to put him in a new one. Things were finally looking up for us, and I didn’t want to fuck things up again. Niall had only confessed his love for me, and I couldn’t even tell him that I was fucking knocked up. There was only one person I knew I could talk to. I pulled out my phone and dialed Liam.

He answered on the first ring. “Charlie! How are you, babe? Heard things with you and Niall are doing better!” The sweetness of his tone made me want to confess everything to him right then and there.

I bit my lip and answered, “Hi, Liam. I’m doing okay. Do you mind grabbing lunch or something with me? I feel like I haven’t seen you in ages.” I tried not to sound worried, but Liam caught on anyway.

“Oh, no. Of course I can, Charlie. Want to meet me at Cliff’s Edge at 1?” I agreed to meet him and hung up the phone. Dumping what was left of my coffee in the sink, I went to my room to shower and get ready.

Cliff’s Edge was packed, but I was happy to find Liam already sitting at a table with two diet Pepsis on hand. “I didn’t know if you’d be hungry so I didn’t order yet. Are you hungry? Because if you are I can call the waitress back over here. Her name is Samantha. Or was it Sandy? Oh bloody Hell, where did she run off to?” Liam searched for our waitress while I hid my laugh. Whenever he was nervous he always babbled on like a fool. The thought that he cared so much comforted me.

“It’s fine, Liam. I’m not really hungry right now.” He averted his attention back to me and gave me a concerning look.

“Charlie, what is going on? I’m worried.”

I took a deep breath before I spoke. “Liam, I’m…I’m pregnant.”

I squeezed my eyes shut as soon as the words left my mouth. When I opened them, Liam was just staring at me. I couldn’t read the expression on his face. We sat there for a while, just staring at each other. The silence was killing me; I had to end it.

“Say something Liam I’m uncomfortable.”

He choked out a laugh, “You’re uncomfortable? I just find out my best mate’s girlfriend is pregnant and I’m guessing said best mate doesn’t know. Think of the position I’m in right now, Charlie.” Wow, I had never seen Liam so forceful.

“I know, and I’m sorry, Liam. I just need advice is all.” He shook his head but continued his calm.

“How long have you known?”

I started to peel off my nail polish. “Since yesterday. I was going to tell Niall…but then…” I trailed off, not knowing how I was going to explain myself.

“So you haven’t been to the doctor yet? Just an at home test?” I nodded and he took my hand. “I think I know where we can start then, Charlie.” I squeezed his hand as he left a ten dollar bill on the table. “By the way, I’m happy you came to me, babe. It means a lot.” I kissed his cheek and we left the restaurant.

--------

I could never book a doctor’s appointment this late in the afternoon, but I guess being a member of the number one boy band in the world has its perks. Liam called the best OBGYN in LA to set up an appointment for me. The wait in the lobby was awkward. There were tons of screaming kids and babies gurgling up whatever they had eaten at lunch. I loved kids, I really did. I’ve been babysitting since I was fifteen, and I always loved playing Barbies or throwing around a football. It was just the fact that I was so young. I planned on starting a family, but at the age of 21, it’s not what I had in mind. I was thinking early 30s, late 20s maybe. That way I was comfortable with a job and married with a nice house – not still in college and more worried about final exams than buying diapers.

While I psyched myself out, Liam read a magazine article titled “What to Expect When You’re Expecting.” He seemed so into learning whatever he could in order to help me through this. At that moment, I was so glad to have him as a friend. Naomi and Kim were my best friends, but I didn’t want to burden them. They had their happy lives, and now I had a baby on the way. And honestly, Kim and I hadn’t really talked much since she started hanging out with Zayn. I didn’t even have the chance to tell her I was pregnant yet. I understood, I mean, I would probably cut myself off from everyone if I was dating an Arabian sex god. Seeing as how I knew I could count on Liam for anything, I confided in him, and he did tell me he’d always be a shoulder to cry on. I grabbed his hand as I continued to drown in my thoughts. Soon, a nurse called my name and beckoned me to the patient rooms.

Everything seemed a blur. The doctor came in and introduced herself, and then gave me a physical. Once that was over, she took a look at my goods. Liam covered his eyes with one hand as he held my hand with the other. After making sure everything was in tip-top shape, she tested me for pregnancy. After a ten minute wait, she announced a proper “Congratulations” and said my husband and I should be very happy. I ignored her assumption while I asked her what to do next. As she was giving me the spiel, my body went numb. All I could think about was that I still had to tell Niall. She handed me a bunch of pamphlets and a prescription for pre-natal vitamins. I stared out the window the drive back to my apartment, Liam trying to lighten the mood by playing some old-school Britney Spears.

As he pulled up to my place, he turned to me. “Charlie, listen. I know this is all very shocking and new, but you need to tell Niall. He’ll understand, he will. It may not have seemed like it lately, but the boy is madly in love with you and would do anything for you. Promise me you’ll tell him tonight?”

Oh right, we were all going to a benefit tonight to help raise money for St. Jude’s. It was supposed to be a fun night…fancy dinner, live performances, and then “oh by the way, I’m carrying your bastard child.” This was going to be great.

I kissed Liam’s cheek, “Promise, Liam. Thank you so much.” I exited the car and entered my apartment.

Naomi was still out with her boyfriend, and I took the opportunity alone to cry. I cried about the situation I was put in. I cried because I was scared. I cried because I knew I wasn’t ready for any of this. I cried long and hard. This wasn’t fair. I didn’t deserve this. I was a good kid; I worked hard in school and got good grades. I didn’t do drugs, I only socially drank. I volunteered whenever possible and always donated to whichever charity was asking. I cried more because I was angry. Angry at myself, and for some reason at Niall. I didn’t know why, but my anger for him was growing. I kept imagining scenarios that he would leave me to care for this child alone, or that he would be a dick about the entire situation and only be there for publicity purposes. It pissed me off more than I could imagine. Was I losing my mind? Most likely.

I threw on my Alice + Olivia Francesca Gathered Overlay Gown that Naomi helped me buy earlier in the week. It was edgy but chic, something that I definitely couldn’t be wearing in the next few months. I put my hair into a messy bun and did a dark eye and red lip. Maybe if I looked sexy enough, Niall wouldn’t be as upset about the news. I’m a very logical person I know. I received a text that a car was waiting for me out front and I walked outside.

Zayn was standing outside the car, just like the first time I met him the night of the party; it seemed like a lifetime ago. He was smoking a Menthol and smiling in my direction. “Car, m’lady?” He bowed as he opened the door for me. I let out a giggle and gave him a hug.

I hopped into the car and saw my boyfriend looking refreshed and new. He gave me a big smooch and smiled at me. I wiped the red lipstick off his face, “feeling better, babe?”

“Now that I’m with you again, of course.” He kept smiling and I mentally kicked myself in the ass. I turned around to say hello to everyone, and was surprised to see Kim in the back with Eleanor.

“Kim! I didn’t know you were coming!” What I wanted to say was, “What the fuck why didn’t you tell me you were going tonight?” but decided against it.

“Oh, yeah. Zayn invited me.” She shrugged her shoulders and continued her previous conversation with Eleanor. Okay? Just what I needed, my best friend to be a cunt while I was freaking out that I had a child growing in me. I made small-chat with everyone on the way there, and Niall kept kissing my neck, making me even more nervous to tell him.

When we arrived Niall threw me onto the red carpet with him. Tons of pictures were taken of us, and I did my best to look like a perfect girlfriend – even though I was far from it. I smiled extra wide when I saw Kim having to stay behind away from Zayn. Served the bitch right. After my eyes were bleached by the flashing lights, we made our way inside and sat down at a lovely table.

We were served fancy hors d’oeuvres I couldn’t pronounce and I passed on some of the most expensive champagne I had ever laid eyes on. Niall look confused by my turndown, but I blamed it on a headache, which was not entirely a lie. I tried to act as happy as possible and not let on that I was nervous as fuck. Niall was being a sweetheart the entire time, which was making it ten times harder to tell him.

Carrie Underwood was the first performer of the night, and her absolute gorgeousness distracted me from my thoughts for a few minutes. I sang along to “Two Black Cadillac’s” and “Blown Away” and was completely consumed by her presence. Next we were served a salad that had a bunch of shit that tasted like dirt and a dressing that was basically just apple cider vinegar. It reminded of the food they used to serve at my parents’ country club back home. Of course, Kennedy and I made friends with all the waiters and they would bring us burgers and fries instead. I picked at the beetroots on my plate and looked up at Niall, who was inhaling his salad like there was no tomorrow. I flicked a cactus flower at his head and he stopped mid-chew. Smiling with vinegar dripping down his chin, he grabbed my plate and dumped its contents onto his own.

Bruno Mars was on stage next, and Niall grabbed my hand to dance with me. We tore it up to “Locked Out of Heaven” and soon everyone was joining in. At one point I looked over at our table and saw Kim giving me a death glare. Zayn doesn’t dance unless he’s under the influence, but I didn’t get why she couldn’t just join in on the fun. I mouthed to her what’s wrong and she stormed off in the direction of the bathrooms. I excused myself from Niall and followed the brat.

She was standing by the bathroom doors pacing. “What’s wrong, Kim?” I asked avoiding a waiter with a tray full of drinks.

“What’s wrong is that you’re a fucking bitch. You’ve been so moody and bitchy lately that I can’t stand it. Then you get all pissed that I’m here. You know what, Charlie? I deserve to be here just as much as you do.” Oh Hell no. I was not going to let her ruin my night.

“First off, fuck you. Second, I have a right to pissed because you didn’t even have the decency to tell me you were coming. We could have got ready together but no you had to be all secretive. And if you gave two shits about my life, you would know why I have been an emotional wreck. But no, you’re too addicted to your god damn boytoy to care about anyone else.” She glared at me but kept firing off bullets.

“Oh shut the fuck up. All you do is complain about your life. You are so fucking lucky to even have met Niall, none the less fuck him. That’s all he uses you for isn’t it?” At this point I was about to pounce. My face was hot and my palms were sweaty. I dug my nails into my hand before I retaliated.

“Go fuck yourself. Niall using me for sex? Funny, because we’ve been dating for 3 months and he loves to show me off in public. Who was it behind everything during the red carpet? Oh that’s right, YOU. How does it feel being the rebound of Perrie? Don’t you dare talk about my relationship, Kim, when you barely fucking have one.”

“Jesus Christ, Charlie! What the fuck is your problem?”

“My problem is that I’M FUCKING PREGNANT YOU COW!” I screamed at her and saw the look of shock in her eyes. When I saw them move behind me, I turned around to see Niall gawking on, the blood completely drawn from his face.