Shut up & Kiss me
☆ Chapter 20 ☆
*Luke’s POV*
I awoke late the next morning, which means I was running late for practice.
I had no motivation to do anything, but lay in bed imagining her in my arms, but unfortunately music is my passion so I couldn’t miss practice.
As I kick the pavement near Calum’s house, i am reminded that my two least favourite people are going to be there. After all, they are in my band
I make myself at home, making my way down to the basement to find that they have already started without me.
Ashton’s nose is bruised purple and Michael’s eye is patched up
“So you finally decided to show up, huh?” Michael’s sarcastic tone fills the room
“What the hell are you doing Luke?” Calum asks just as place my guitar on the stand
“What does it look like im doing?” i remark back at him
“Who the fuck do you think you are!” he yells “beating up your own best friends?!”
“They won’t keep their hands of Alex!!” i yell, shoving Calum in the chest
He shoves me back “Thats enough!, you can’t just keep hurting them cause you feel like it”
“You don’t understand!” i push him and he stumbles back
“Get out!” he yells as he is on his feet again
“What about practice!?” i yell/ask
“Its over, you’re kicked out!!”
**
Ok, so now my life started to feel like complete shit
I lost my friends, my band and most importantly, Alex
I have never felt this way before. This pain, the unpleasant feeling of loss.
Oh wait; there was a time when i did feel the same pain....
*FLASHBACK*
LUKE: AGE 14
My dad and I arrived home after the 1 month mass for my mum’s funeral.
On this date today, last month, my mum died from lung cancer. She always smoked and my dad did the same, but after she died he immediately stopped.
He needed my mum as much as I needed her. My dad was a caring man, but i didn’t think he could cope on his own.
It got pretty lonely for me since then. I am an only child, so since my mum’s death it’s always been me and him.
**
“Dad?”
“Daaaa-ad” i yell from upstairs again
I walk down finding him sitting by the kitchen counter drowning in a bottle of vodka
“Dad?”
“Yes Lukey, what is it?” he slightly snapped
I’ve never seen him like this before, but if you ask me, he was drunk
“Are you, ok dad?”
At this point i was scared of him. His eyes were bloodshot and you could tell that he had lost most coordination in his body.
“N-no Luke, I’m not. I am done, i need to be with her, I’m sorry but I have to go. I have to see her”
With that, he stumbled towards the front door
And left, without another word
**
I felt lonely, sick, aches in my stomach and pain in my chest.
Then the realisation hit me that he was never coming back
I was on my own.
*END OF FLASHBACK*
I found my own source of comfort from then on. I remember finishing the vodka my dad had started before and pretty much his entire Liquor cabinet.
I found drugs and alcohol as my only friend, and until i turned 16, i found using girls for sex another pretty good pain relief. I thought if it was ok for my dad to leave me and abandon me that it was ok for me to do the same with girls.
I have been on my own ever since my ad left me. I never stayed with my aunt’s and uncle’s and i have never since my dad since.
I never really think of what happened to him, If he died or if he is still living in our world, but it never really crossed my mind until now.
The reminder of this pain has now reminded me that i had fucked up so so bad.
And now i feel like that lost 14 year old i was without my dad, but this time it’s my 18 year old without the love of my life, Alex.
*Alex’s POV*
“Bye Marcel!” i wave as he leaves my house.
We hung out at my place since my parents when out together for some grocery shopping.
Marcel seemed disappointed in me, for encountering in Luke again, but this time i made sure that he trusts me in staying away from Luke for good.
It still hurts to think about him, the unpleasant pains i feel at the mention of his name, but i coping ok,
for now
The sound of the house phone rings through the living room, as i pick up the phone meeting a sobbing voice
“Hello?”
“A-alex honey, its dad” muffled cry’s are heard as he speaks
“Dad whats wrong? Where’s mum? Why are you crying?”
“Just p-please make your way over to the hospital, your m-mum she’s..”
“What’s wrong with mum?”
No response
“Dad?”
“Shit!” i yell as i put the phone down. The call got disconnected
How do i get to the hospital, i don’t have a car!?
I grab my cardigan in a rush and open the front door and jolt back in surprise, to the person standly right before me.
Luke
My actions go ahead before my mind catches up as i sob into Luke chest and he holds me tighly
“Alex whats wrong?”
“M-my m-mum, something’s happened and I need to get to the hospital”
**
I have calmed down abit, as Luke drives to the hospital.
I break the silence “Look, just to let you know, i am still mad at you” I look outside the car window, not daring to make eye contact with him
“Well that hug we shared before was pretty romantic” he jokes
“Luke i am serious, and I’m in no mood for your humour, i have no idea what’s going on with my mum!”
“Baby relax, everything is going to be ok” he cools, and still drives
“I’m not your baby” i snap
“Here we go” he sighs and i roll my eyes
“Look just letting you know, i am not as okay with what happened the other night as you think i am-“Luke starts
“Thanks” i say as he stops at the carpark, and i stop him from further conversation about the other night. I open the door, but i find he has locked it “Can you let me out please?” i ask
“Not until you talk to me”
“Luke my mother is in that hospital right now, let me go”
He huffs and unlocks the doors
“Thankyou”
He nods in appreciation and gets out the car as well and follows me inside.
I spot my dad pacing the hospital grounds with his hands covering his face
“Dad!!”
He turns around facing me and engulfs me in a hug
“W-what happened?” i ask into his shoulder as he still holds me in a hug
“S-she, s-she..” he struggles to say and gets interrupted by a nurse
“Excuse me, Mr Jones, can i please speak to you in the E.R room?”
My dad nods to the nurse and tells me to take a seat on the waiting room chairs; Luke follows and sits next to me
“I don’t know whats going on” i sob and rest my head on Luke’s shoulder and we sit elbow, to elbow.
Small tears fall onto his black jeans and he rubs my hand with his, as he comforts me
“What if she’s dead” I sob harder and cuddle into him before realization catches up with me. I jolt up from my seat
“What am i doing?” i question myself as my hands hold the sides of my head and i pace around the room. Luke stands up also
“Alex, i know what you’re going through, i lost my mum too”
I stop pacing “What?”
We take our seats back, and sit facing one another, inches away.
“s-she died of cancer when i was 14”
“Luke i am so sorry”
“So we have more in common then you think” Luke says
“But you don’t’ understand Luke, the last thing i said to her was a promise to stay away from you”
“Alex,” he begins and takes my chin between the pad of his thumb and his index finger and tits it up so I am looking directly at him “you and I both know that it’s impossible to stay away from each other
I wanted to convince myself that what he said was a lie,
but it was the truth
I awoke late the next morning, which means I was running late for practice.
I had no motivation to do anything, but lay in bed imagining her in my arms, but unfortunately music is my passion so I couldn’t miss practice.
As I kick the pavement near Calum’s house, i am reminded that my two least favourite people are going to be there. After all, they are in my band
I make myself at home, making my way down to the basement to find that they have already started without me.
Ashton’s nose is bruised purple and Michael’s eye is patched up
“So you finally decided to show up, huh?” Michael’s sarcastic tone fills the room
“What the hell are you doing Luke?” Calum asks just as place my guitar on the stand
“What does it look like im doing?” i remark back at him
“Who the fuck do you think you are!” he yells “beating up your own best friends?!”
“They won’t keep their hands of Alex!!” i yell, shoving Calum in the chest
He shoves me back “Thats enough!, you can’t just keep hurting them cause you feel like it”
“You don’t understand!” i push him and he stumbles back
“Get out!” he yells as he is on his feet again
“What about practice!?” i yell/ask
“Its over, you’re kicked out!!”
**
Ok, so now my life started to feel like complete shit
I lost my friends, my band and most importantly, Alex
I have never felt this way before. This pain, the unpleasant feeling of loss.
Oh wait; there was a time when i did feel the same pain....
*FLASHBACK*
LUKE: AGE 14
My dad and I arrived home after the 1 month mass for my mum’s funeral.
On this date today, last month, my mum died from lung cancer. She always smoked and my dad did the same, but after she died he immediately stopped.
He needed my mum as much as I needed her. My dad was a caring man, but i didn’t think he could cope on his own.
It got pretty lonely for me since then. I am an only child, so since my mum’s death it’s always been me and him.
**
“Dad?”
“Daaaa-ad” i yell from upstairs again
I walk down finding him sitting by the kitchen counter drowning in a bottle of vodka
“Dad?”
“Yes Lukey, what is it?” he slightly snapped
I’ve never seen him like this before, but if you ask me, he was drunk
“Are you, ok dad?”
At this point i was scared of him. His eyes were bloodshot and you could tell that he had lost most coordination in his body.
“N-no Luke, I’m not. I am done, i need to be with her, I’m sorry but I have to go. I have to see her”
With that, he stumbled towards the front door
And left, without another word
**
I felt lonely, sick, aches in my stomach and pain in my chest.
Then the realisation hit me that he was never coming back
I was on my own.
*END OF FLASHBACK*
I found my own source of comfort from then on. I remember finishing the vodka my dad had started before and pretty much his entire Liquor cabinet.
I found drugs and alcohol as my only friend, and until i turned 16, i found using girls for sex another pretty good pain relief. I thought if it was ok for my dad to leave me and abandon me that it was ok for me to do the same with girls.
I have been on my own ever since my ad left me. I never stayed with my aunt’s and uncle’s and i have never since my dad since.
I never really think of what happened to him, If he died or if he is still living in our world, but it never really crossed my mind until now.
The reminder of this pain has now reminded me that i had fucked up so so bad.
And now i feel like that lost 14 year old i was without my dad, but this time it’s my 18 year old without the love of my life, Alex.
*Alex’s POV*
“Bye Marcel!” i wave as he leaves my house.
We hung out at my place since my parents when out together for some grocery shopping.
Marcel seemed disappointed in me, for encountering in Luke again, but this time i made sure that he trusts me in staying away from Luke for good.
It still hurts to think about him, the unpleasant pains i feel at the mention of his name, but i coping ok,
for now
The sound of the house phone rings through the living room, as i pick up the phone meeting a sobbing voice
“Hello?”
“A-alex honey, its dad” muffled cry’s are heard as he speaks
“Dad whats wrong? Where’s mum? Why are you crying?”
“Just p-please make your way over to the hospital, your m-mum she’s..”
“What’s wrong with mum?”
No response
“Dad?”
“Shit!” i yell as i put the phone down. The call got disconnected
How do i get to the hospital, i don’t have a car!?
I grab my cardigan in a rush and open the front door and jolt back in surprise, to the person standly right before me.
Luke
My actions go ahead before my mind catches up as i sob into Luke chest and he holds me tighly
“Alex whats wrong?”
“M-my m-mum, something’s happened and I need to get to the hospital”
**
I have calmed down abit, as Luke drives to the hospital.
I break the silence “Look, just to let you know, i am still mad at you” I look outside the car window, not daring to make eye contact with him
“Well that hug we shared before was pretty romantic” he jokes
“Luke i am serious, and I’m in no mood for your humour, i have no idea what’s going on with my mum!”
“Baby relax, everything is going to be ok” he cools, and still drives
“I’m not your baby” i snap
“Here we go” he sighs and i roll my eyes
“Look just letting you know, i am not as okay with what happened the other night as you think i am-“Luke starts
“Thanks” i say as he stops at the carpark, and i stop him from further conversation about the other night. I open the door, but i find he has locked it “Can you let me out please?” i ask
“Not until you talk to me”
“Luke my mother is in that hospital right now, let me go”
He huffs and unlocks the doors
“Thankyou”
He nods in appreciation and gets out the car as well and follows me inside.
I spot my dad pacing the hospital grounds with his hands covering his face
“Dad!!”
He turns around facing me and engulfs me in a hug
“W-what happened?” i ask into his shoulder as he still holds me in a hug
“S-she, s-she..” he struggles to say and gets interrupted by a nurse
“Excuse me, Mr Jones, can i please speak to you in the E.R room?”
My dad nods to the nurse and tells me to take a seat on the waiting room chairs; Luke follows and sits next to me
“I don’t know whats going on” i sob and rest my head on Luke’s shoulder and we sit elbow, to elbow.
Small tears fall onto his black jeans and he rubs my hand with his, as he comforts me
“What if she’s dead” I sob harder and cuddle into him before realization catches up with me. I jolt up from my seat
“What am i doing?” i question myself as my hands hold the sides of my head and i pace around the room. Luke stands up also
“Alex, i know what you’re going through, i lost my mum too”
I stop pacing “What?”
We take our seats back, and sit facing one another, inches away.
“s-she died of cancer when i was 14”
“Luke i am so sorry”
“So we have more in common then you think” Luke says
“But you don’t’ understand Luke, the last thing i said to her was a promise to stay away from you”
“Alex,” he begins and takes my chin between the pad of his thumb and his index finger and tits it up so I am looking directly at him “you and I both know that it’s impossible to stay away from each other
I wanted to convince myself that what he said was a lie,
but it was the truth
Notes
**OK, SO FIRSTLY, I AM SORRY IF ANYONE WAS UNCOMFORTABLE WITH THE TOPIC OF CANCER AND DEATH, BECAUSE IT WASN'T MY INTENTION TO HURT ANYONE FEELINGS**IN SAYING THAT, THANK YOU AGAIN FOR GETTING THE STORY ON THE 1ST POPULAR PAGE, IT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME, AND I LOVE YOU ALL
ALSO COMMENT ANY QUESTIONS YOU HAVE ABOUT ME, OR THIS STORY, OR IF YOU JUST DON'T GET SOMETHING THAT HAPPEND IN GENERAL.
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-Madison ツ
I might be behind but...
BATMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2/23/16