Loren POV

I swear this has been the longest and most bizarre day of my life – not to mention quite educational. My day started with Louis and me waking up together in Monaco and ended up with me not even looking like myself anymore in Paris. I have to admit it was a lovely morning and I wanted so much more of Louis. I loved having control over his body even though I had no idea what I was doing. Perrie is helping me with that and started my education with a lecture on the plane that involved ‘Louis the Banana’ and how to handle him in multiple ways. Thank God there was alcohol on board because I needed a drink after that – and I’m not a drinker. I didn’t know whether to be mortified, scared, or excited by what she was explaining to me.

As if taking in all the sex information was not enough, I spent hours of torture with stylists. I think every hair that is not on my head was lasered off my body and it’s a weird sensation. Although I have to admit that the thought of never shaving again, after a few more sessions, is appealing. I feel very exposed down below, but Perrie assures me it is going to drive Louis wild when he makes the discovery. Again, when I least need it with him several countries away, all I can think about is him touching me. Let’s be honest, all I did today was think of him and it made all the threading, lasering, highlighting, makeup, and everything else go a lot easier with thoughts of Louis distracting my brain.

Even better was when I heard from him tonight. Honestly, I thought he was going to be happy to be rid of me, but he was so cute whining tonight. Maybe he really does love me. Everything inside me is screaming that what’s between us is real. My heart, that I didn’t know existed, demands him. I just wish my brain agreed. It’s still hard for me to fathom that Louis loves me. That it’s possible to love someone that quickly, but I do.

The only truly bad thing that happened today was learning about his sexual past from Perrie. It bothers me that Louis mislead me. My insecurities about being a virgin multiplied to infinity after hearing the sheer numbers of girls he bedded. Louis is going to pay for his deceit and sending the lingerie selfie is just the beginning. I have my plan and he is going to confess and beg forgiveness before I am done with him.

Speaking of sex, now that we’ve finished three racks of lingerie – if you can even call some of that lingerie because there was nothing there – we are going to have movie time. I’m standing, staring at myself in the mirror in disbelief of the skimpy teddy I’m wearing. It’s nothing but a few strategically placed strips of cloth over sheer black lace with panties that barely cover anything. Perrie didn’t let me bring anything from home except empty luggage and she ordered all my clothing be removed from my room while we are away so I only have my new lingerie to wear tonight. She even had housekeeping throw out the clothes I wore today.

According to Perrie, I need to embrace my inner sex goddess and get used to the new me. It’s definitely a new me. My hair is relaxed, styled in long layers that cascade past my breasts, and highlighted. My brows are perfectly arched and my makeup applied to perfection. I even take the time to admire my perfectly manicured nails and toes in fire engine red polish. Again, Perrie’s idea to go for the bold red shade. The person staring back at me in the mirror is a stranger to me and all I hope is Louis sees that I’m still the same person under this new shell. I feel self-conscious being this vain, but I just can’t believe the image I am looking at is me. I never dreamed I could look like this and I hope Louis is proud to be seen with me now. My outward appearance might look confident, but I’m still the same insecure girl inside questioning everything.

“Hey sexy lady! Come on out! The movie is starting!” Perrie’s shouting pulls me out of my thoughts.

“Be right there!” I take one more look in the mirror and head out to the lounge.

“Took you long enough. Oooh good choice! Louis is going to rip that right off you,” Perrie says raising her eyebrows at me. I feel myself blush.

“So, please explain what the point is of torturing myself to get into this contraption if all he’s going to do is take it off right away?” Honestly, why go to all this trouble? I think I am more comfortable being naked than wearing this.

“That’s the whole point love. The sexier you look, the more desperate he is to have you, the sooner you are naked,” she says and winks.

“Ugh. Let’s just get this humiliation over with,” I sigh.

“There is nothing humiliating about this. This is to further your sex education so you won’t be so nervous with that maniac,” she laughs.

“Fine.” I lay down on the couch opposite the one Perrie is on and my eyes grow big as I watch the opening scene of this ‘movie’.

It becomes obvious fairly quickly that no one watches these types of movies for their great cinematic value. I can’t control my laughter over the horrific acting, but I’m soon quiet when the dialogue stops and the real actions starts.

“Loren, if it makes you more comfortable, just imagine that it’s you and Louis you are watching,” Perrie encourages me.

“How would I be more comfortable watching what I believe to be me and Louis in front of you?” I roll my eyes and she throws a pillow at me.

“Just suck it up,” she giggles.

“Apparently,” I nod as the girl on the screen does exactly that and we both start laughing.

For the next hour, we watch the movie and at the end I am a hot mess. I did exactly what Perrie suggested – I imagined Louis and I doing all those things to each other and I want to scream in frustration.

“Loren, you are flushed,” Perrie points out.

“What do you expect after watching that?” I retort.

“Well, what did you think?” She wiggles her eyebrows at me.

“I think I hate you and I need a cold shower,” I say while pouting and Perrie laughs.

“I take it the movie was, uh, ‘helpful’?” She says with an arched brow.

“Considering Louis is not even in the same country as me right now – NO!” Again, I pout and cross my arms over my chest.

“Someone is sexually frustrated,” she sing-songs, “so, you do want to do those things with Louis, don’t you?”

“Yes! Are you happy?!” I yell and am completely embarrassed as I cover my face with my hands.

“Delighted love,” she says. I look up at her with a shocked expression only to be greeted by her smug smile. “Well, after that, I need to call Zayn before I can sleep. You might want to give Louis a quick call. Maybe he can help you with your situation, but get sleep because you have another busy day and flight to Milan.”

“Can hardly wait. Nite,” I say as I get up and head towards my room.

I check the time and see it’s close to 1am. Surely, Louis is asleep now. I’m not going to call him, but I really want him after watching that movie and the feeling won’t go away. Maybe I should just text him and, if he’s asleep, I’ll just have to suffer without hearing his soothing voice. I enter my room and pick up my phone from the nightstand. When the screen appears, I see I have text message. As the app opens, I see it’s from Louis and I smile.

Louis: Can’t sleep without you love. L xo

The message was sent about 15 minutes ago so he might still be awake.

Loren: Me either. L xo

Immediately, the text bubble pops up.

Louis: “Are you done for the night?”

Loren: “Yes. You too tired to talk?”

Within seconds, my phone rings.

“Hey love.” I melt when I hear his voice.

“Hey,” why I sound so shy I have no idea. Maybe it’s because my brain has all those images floating around of things I want to do with him.

“Buy anymore knickers?”

“Yes, if you can even call them that,” I giggle.

“What are you wearing?” He asks in an exceptionally deep voice.

“Why do you ask?”

“I need a visual.”

“Well, if you must know. I’m not wearing much of anything. This stuff barely covers the essentials.”

“Picture. Now.” He demands.

“Why? So we can both be tortured?” I sass.

“Someone missing me?”

“Yes, I miss you Lou and I wish you were in my bed right now. Happy?”

“No. I miss you and I want you too much to be happy about that. We’ll suffer together baby.” He coos.

“Please don’t call me baby. I can’t handle it right now,” I plead.

“Oh someone is really horny,” he teases. Well, that just pissed me off. I’ll get him back.

“You know what? Hold on.” If I’m going to suffer in this state, misery loves company. I go to my photo app and position my phone as I lay on the bed. A quick check of my photography skills and I message it off to Louis. “Check your messages.”

“Okay.” A few seconds later I hear him hiss and swear. “Why would you do that to me Lor?” He says with a little agony in his voice.

“Now we can really suffer together,” I reply trying to sound logical.

“Or we can do something about it,” I don’t need to see his face because his smirk rings loud and clear through the phone line.

“And what would that be?” I’m curious.

“Get each other off.”

“How?”

“I love how innocent you are baby. We could face time?”

“No, nice try but no seeing the face and hair until I see you in person.”

“Okay, then over the phone it is. Now, I want you to lay on your back and spread your legs open. Bend your knees so you’re wide open for me.”

“This is silly,” I protest.

“Do it baby or I’ll spank you when you get home.”

“Oh all right. Calm yourself. Now what?”

“Put the phone on speaker and lay it next to you. Then, I want you to massage your breasts like I do. Imagine it’s me touching you.”

I do as I’m told and immediately moan thinking about Louis’ hands on me.

“Good girl. Keep going. Twist your nipples like I do.”

I listen and I’m so desperate for him to begin with that this feels like torture.

“Lou, this is torture. It’s making the ache worse,” I whine.

“Baby, you’ll feel good soon. Start sliding one of your hands down those gorgeous abs of yours. Lower. Now slip your hand inside your knickers like I would and rub your clit.”

“Oh my God Louis,” I moan.

“That’s it baby. Keep rubbing. I’m touching myself just like you touched me this morning and I’m visualizing you are on top of me again.”

“Ahhhhhh,” is the only response I can muster as the pleasure builds within and I imagine Louis naked touching himself.

“Oh fuck. Slip a finger inside you,” Louis gasps into the phone and drives me to the brink of insanity as I follow his command.

“Oh Lou, I-I-I can’t handle it,” my body is craving for release, but I don’t know if I can do it without him here.

“Stick another finger in and pump baby. The thought of you like this. Shit, it makes me want to cum right now,” he moans.

I’m no longer capable of words and it appears he isn’t either. Nothing but a series of moans and grunts are exchanged over the phone. When I hear Louis emit a string of curses, I know he’s hit his orgasm and it sends me over the edge writhing and gasping. After a few minutes, I’m composed but suddenly feel shy about speaking.

“Are you there love or did you pass out?” Louis chuckles.

“I’m here,” I say quietly.

“Are you okay baby?” His voice is filled with concern.

“Yes, I just. I don’t know. I can’t believe we just did that.” I feel my cheeks heat up.

“Well, we did and I feel so much better,” Louis says unapologetically.

“I do feel better,” I admit.

“Good. Do you think you can sleep now?”

“Yes. But tell me first, did you do anything fun tonight since I talked to you?”

“I did. I cuddled with Niall,” he says proudly. I laugh hysterically. “What? Niall is the best cuddler!” He yells.

“Better than me?”

“Unfortunately, yes. You cuddle with him once and you’ll see. Wait. Scratch that. No cuddling with Niall for you. I’m keeping you all to myself.”

“That’s not fair! Why do you get to cuddle with Niall?”

“Because I needed comfort. I miss you too much,” he whined.

“Oh, guess I’ll go climb into bed with Perrie then,” I sass.

“Uh no. I do not need that visual now that I am relaxed again.”

“Well, I guess I should be happy you chose Niall instead of another girl,” I say trying to be funny.

“Don’t ever say that Lor. I would never choose another girl over you. It’s not even anything to joke about,” he says with all seriousness.

My mind immediately snaps to the long list of girls Louis slept with and I try to contain my anger and insecurity. I do not want to have this conversation with him on the phone and I don’t want to ruin my mood.

“Sorry. I’m very tired. I think I’m ready for bed,” I say apologetically.

“Baby, what’s wrong. Please tell me you aren’t seriously thinking about what you just said. You can’t think I’d cheat on you,” he says in a dead serious tone.

“Louis, we don’t need to talk about that. That’s not a conversation I want to have now.”

“It’s not a conversation we ever need to have because it won’t happen,” he snaps.

“Okay. Love you. I’ll call you tomorrow when we leave for the airport. Get some rest and go do something fun tomorrow,” I attempt to redirect the conversation.

“Loren, I’m serious. Don’t be thinking those kind of thoughts,” he sounds desperate for me to believe him and I want to. I really do.

“Really. It’s okay Louis. Don’t worry about it,” I try to calm him down.

“Okay. I love you baby.”

“I love you too Lou. Nite.”

“Nite baby.” We hang up and I just stare at my phone looking for answers to the unanswered questions running through my mind.

My body and mind were exhausted, but I could not sleep for a long time. I threw my insecurities into our conversation and I couldn’t take it back. Louis isn’t stupid. He saw right through me that I wasn’t joking when I made that comment. It’s just that, as I said before, things have moved so fast with us. There is so much I don’t know about him and at least one thing I’ve learned is concerning. How can he be so devoted to me when his past behavior is contrary? We have a lot to learn about each other. Regardless of my new exterior, the same old insecurities are inside of me. I just hope I can overcome them and not sabotage our relationship.

Notes

I'm so sorry that it took three weeks to update and all you got was this piece of crap chapter. I was away on a trip and then I broke my ankle and doped up on pain meds. So, I finally was up to writing the rest of this chapter tonight.

Any predictions on what's going to happen when Loren and Louis see each other? Is it going to be a happy reunion or are things going to get ugly?

Thanks for reading!!!