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My Heart Skips A Beat

Chapter 15

We didn’t actually get up until around noon, and we only did then because we were starving and desperate for food. One of the main things I’ve learned on this trip is that Harry is a pretty decent cook. Like now, when I walked into the kitchen after showering, he was making eggs, bacon, toast, and coffee for me, tea for him.
“Have you ever even had coffee?” I asked, taking the mug from him.
“I actually don’t think I have.”
“Are you serious?! Okay, you need to try this!” I shoved the cup at him, which he sniffed and pulled a disgusted face.
“It smells sort of terrible.” But he still brought it to his lips, taking a teeny tiny hesitant sip.
“UGH, that’s TERRIBLE! It tastes like dirt, how do you drink that!?”
“Um, I’m a New Yorker. Duh.”
“Well, I’m English. So I’ll just stick to the tea.” I smirked at him as he handed me a full plate.
“I could get used to this culinary side.” I joked, plopping down at the tiny kitchen table.
“Ha! Yeah, I wouldn’t if I were you. The most Lou and I usually have in our place is milk, that’s always at least a week expired, beer, and maybe some cereal. But only if you’re lucky.”
“Hm, I guess you might want to do something else with ALL the free time you have.” We joked like this all through breakfast, a smile permanently plastered on my face. I just felt so…happy, and content, with everything in my life right now. Which, for me, was extremely rare.
“What time do you think we should start heading back?” Harry asked once we were finished.
“Hmmm. How about…never?”
“Babe, you know I would do that in a heartbeat. But you have this thing called school. And I have this thing-“
“-Called being a celebrity?”
“Yeah, that.” We both laughed.
“Than I guess we better get going?” I said with a pout, looping my arms casually around his neck.
“I think we may have a little time for something…” Harry began with a growl. Suddenly, he scooped me into his arms and brought me over to the couch, covering me with his body. Our lips never parted, his tongue moving against mine in a way that made me feel like I was in the world’s best dream.
Unfortunately, that dream was woken up by a buzzing under my back.
“Mmm! Hold on, I think my phone’s vibrating.” I said, pulling away from Harry and finding my phone wedged between the two couch cushions. I pulled it out, seeing that I had over a dozen missed calls.
“Huh. Have you talked to anyone today?”
“No, why?”
“I have tons of missed calls from everyone; the boys, El and Dani, even Molly…. That’s so weird. I told them where we were going…”
“Lemme check.” Harry said, getting up and grabbing his phone off the kitchen counter.
“Strange, I have a load too. I’ll call Louis.”
“I’m calling Molly.”
“ANNA!” Molly’s voice was frantic and nervous when she picked up after only one ring.
“What’s going on Molly, is everything okay? EVERYONE is calling me.”
Shit!” I heard Harry say from across the room, his phone against his ear. So much was going on right now, I couldn’t focus.
“Anna! What the fu- Are you there?!”
“Yeah, yeah. I’m here.”
“Have you seen the pictures?”
‘What pictures.”
“Anna, you need to go talk to Harry, tell him to call one of the other guys, his management, something. ANYTHING.”
“Mol- what’s going on? What are you talking about?” I was starting to feel nervous with the fact that it was clearly something she couldn’t tell me over the phone.
“Just go talk to someone, now.”
“Okay…” I was still confused when she hung up, turning around to see a concerned look on Harry’s face.
“What’s wrong? What’s happening? Molly is freaking out.”
“…Yeah, okay Lou… Yeah, thank you…. Call them right away… We’ll be back soon. Alright, bye.” He put the phone down, an angry look on his face.
“HARRY!” Finally, he looked at me. The look in his eyes was so upset. “Please just tell me what happened.”
“There are some pictures, that got leaked. Of us. From last night.”

My mind was going a mile a minute, my head beating. I had this blood boiling anger inside of me that I don’t think I have ever felt before. When Louis told me what had happened, I thought he was kidding at first. But then, he wasn’t. He wasn’t kidding. This was real. This was happening.
“What do you mean last night?” Anna said, her eyes wide with worry.
“I mean some complete ASSHOLE took god damn fucking pictures of us last night!” I wasn’t yelling at her, I was just yelling because at this very moment, there was nothing else I could do.
“I don’t unde-“ Anna began. But then she stopped; I could tell she was beginning to comprehend what I meant.
“No.” Her voice was barely a whisper. “Oh my god…” Her head fell into her hands.
“Fuck! FUCK!” I kicked one of the chairs that surrounded the kitchen table, just needing to get some of this anger out. Anna didn’t flinch, she didn’t move.
“What am I going to do…?” Her voice was still quiet, muffled even more by her hands.
“It’s already being taken care of. From a legal standpoint.”
“That’s not really what I’m worried about…” She looked up at me, her eyes glassy.
“I know.” I just stood there for a moment, looking at her. She looked so broken.
“I’m so sorry. I am so, so, so sorry. I don’t know what else to say.” I rushed over to sit next to her, pulling her into my chest. I felt her shoulder shake, tears staining my t-shirt. “God damn it. This is all my fucking fault.” I cursed.
“No it isn’t Harry.”
“No. It is, of course it is. They were only taking the pictures because of me.” Se didn’t respond.
We sat there like this for a few more minutes, her silent tears eventually turning into a quiet sob. It hurt more than anything in the world to see her like this, especially knowing it was because of me. I felt completely powerless.
Eventually, she pulled away slightly, looking up at me with red eyes and tear-stained cheeks.
“What do we do?”
“I-Um-“ I needed to be strong here, for her. “We’re going to stay here for one more night. It too much to be in London right now. We can sort things out with your school. But for now, we need to just stay here, stay away from everything. Then, tomorrow we’ll go back home, and I’ll fix everything. I promise.”
“How? How can this be fixed, Harry? Because I don’t think it can!” She sat up, a bit of anger in her voice.
“I guess not fixed. But, handled.”
“I can’t believe this, I really can’t… Oh my god my parents- my brother. My dad’s going to hate me!’ She stood up, beginning to pace back and forth.
“No Harry! No. I am ALLOWED to freak out about this!”
“Of course you are. I just-“
“I cannot believe this happened. For the rest of my LIFE these pictures are going to be out there. Forever. As much as we try, it’s never going away. God, I don’t want to have to see that…” Her voice cracked, showing her true emotion.
“I know. I’m sorry. All we can do now is just, let our people handle it. It’s an invasion of privacy, Anna. It goes against the law. This isn’t going to be taken lightly. The hardest part will be figuring out who took the photo’s in the first place, and who they sold them to.”
“I can’t- I can’t talk about it like that right now. I just can’t.” She sat down again, this time quite a bit further away from me. Her hands were shaking a little, fresh tears rolling down her cheeks. I wanted to scream, I wanted to punch my hand through the wall. I wanted to do SOMETHING. Because sitting here was making me feel truly terrible.

After receiving call after call, I eventually turned my phone off. I assumed that anyone who tried to call me would know why I wasn’t answering. I didn’t want to talk to anybody, or face anyone. I was too embarrassed. Knowing that there were pictures like that, of me, just out there in the world. It was too much.
I think Harry understood. I assumed that was why he was keeping his distance. Like now; I was sitting on one of the big armchairs, my legs pulled up against my chest. He was outside on the tiny patio, talking to his management on the phone. I couldn’t hear the entire conversations, just muffled sounds, and his angry voice. He had been sweet to try and comfort me, but it was useless. I didn’t blame Harry, I couldn’t. But telling me that everything was going to be fine didn’t make it an easier to digest. I think for now I just needed a little time to myself.
I heard the door slide open, “Hey, uh, I’m gonna go into town and get some things. Do you want anything?” Harry asked. I shook my head, not turning to face him. He walked over to where I stood, kneeling down in front of me.
“Anna, please, look at me.” I shook my head again, tears pricking the corners of my eyes.
“I can’t-“
“Please” He pleaded, squeezing my hand. I eventually lifted my eyes so they were level with his. Even now, in a situation like this, he still was beautiful to me. He still managed to make me feel better, without even trying.
“Anna. I am going to do everything I possibly can to try and fix this.”
“I know you are…”
“- No. Just, let me get this out, please.-“ He took a breath, “I love you so much. And I need you to hear that, and remember that. Remember the good parts of this trip, even if all that seems to matter right now are the bad parts. Can you try and do that for me?” He was looking at me with pleading eyes.
“Yes.” I nodded, wiping away the tears. “I love you, Harry. I do. It’s just-“
“I know, I know… Just- remember what I said.” He stood up, grabbing his keys. “I’ll be back soon, alright?”

After Harry had pulled out of the driveway, I knew what I needed to do. As much as I was dreading it; I needed to see the pictures. It sounds crazy, but I just had to. There was no possible way for me to even attempt to get past this if I didn’t. So, I got my laptop from my bag, turning it on and taking a deep breath to calm my nerves. I pulled up the same website I had looked on when the picture of Harry in LA were released, knowing they would be there. It couldn’t be simpler; there it was, right on the front page with the huge headline “HARRY STYLES AND AMERICAN GIRLFRIEND ANNA HOLLIS GET FRISKY AT HIS ‘SECRET’ BUNGALOW”. Almost impulsively, I clicked on the link, and there it was. There were several, slightly blurry, pictures taken fairly far away, through the window of the bedroom we had slept in last night. It scared the hell out of me to know that someone was that close, watching us, and we had no idea. They weren’t too revealing, but it was clear that it really was Harry and me in the pictures. In one you could see my face almost perfectly. My stomached churned as I read the article, the comments, looking at how many people had seen these. I felt like I was going to throw up. But before I could do anything else the phone rang. I wasn’t going to answer it until I recognized the number as Harry and Louis’s apartment phone.
“Hello?” I answered.
“Anna, It’ Louis.”
“Oh, hey Lou…”
“Hey. You feeling a bit better? I know this must be hard.”
“Yeah, it is. I’m uh, I’m doing okay. If you’re looking for Harry, he just went out. You could try him on his cell.”
“No I actually called to talk to you. I just spoke with Harry and he’s a mess, completely gutted. He feels terrible, Anna. And I think he’s trying to be strong for you, but just, I mean… The reason I’m calling is just to tell you to please not shut him out. Or at least try.”
“I’m not shut-“
“I know you may not think so. But he said he could feel you pushing him away, not that any of us blame you. I just think maybe if you hear it from me it’ll be different. Mainly because we both know Haz isn’t really the best with words.” I smiled a little for the first time since all of this happened.
“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”
“All I’m really trying to say is to try and remember how much he cares for you. And remember that this is hard for him too.”
“Did he tell you that?” I asked.
“Not in so many words. But pretty much, yes. He’s just, like I said, completely gutted. I think he’s trying to put on a brave face for you, but just now when I talked to him… he seemed pretty upset.” I felt terrible for not talking to him earlier.
“Thanks for telling my Louis.”
“No problem. You’re part of the family now, Anna. We look out for each other, that’s what we’re all trying to do.” My heart lurched when he said that, I was part of the family. That may be one of the nicest thing’s anyone has ever said to me.
“You’re a really good friend Louis.”
“I try…” I could sense the smirk he most likely had on his face.
“I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Yeah. Good luck with everything. But remember that we’re all here for you through this, alright?”
“Bye then.”


@notarealhipster Who do you imagine anna as?


I'm from the US, outside of Philly :)
Where are you from? My side of the pond (United States) or the other one?
I love this story it's my favorite one I've read so far! :)