Through The Dark(Niall Horan)
This Is It
There were so many things going on in my mind at once. Things started to get blurry and I couldn't breathe. “Niall!” I managed to choke out, hoping it was loud enough for him to hear. I made my way over to the tub and turned off the water, pulling the plug out before sitting down next to it, trying to regain my composure. This wasn't possible. It couldn't be possible. I thought they made sure...
“Did you need something, babe?” Niall poked his head into the bathroom, sandwich in hand. The smile on his face faded when he saw me. “What's wrong? Are you alright?” He rushed to my side, tossing his sandwich into the trash on his way.
I shook my head, pointing to the box of tampons I left laying on the floor. “Oh...you need me to go to the store? You got cramps or something?” At least he was trying to be understanding?
“They're not open Niall...we've lived in this house for a little over four months and I've never opened them...” I looked at him, hoping he would catch on.
Niall opened his mouth and then closed it, opened it and then closed it again. I think it was setting in. “So you haven't had a visit from your friend in that long?” He bit his lip.
I nodded, folding my arms over my midsection. “I've never missed a month before...I can't believe I didn't realize sooner...”
“You had other things to worry about.” Niall sat down next to me, putting his arm around my shoulders. “Do you want me to go to the store?”
I laid my head on his shoulder. “You can't,” I sighed. “someone will see you and it will turn into a big thing...we need someone else to do it.” I honestly didn't know how I was thinking straight right now. Maybe it's because I didn't think it was real.
“True...” Niall sighed, pulling out is phone and scrolling through his contacts.
I grabbed his hand, before he could call anyone. “Let's just go see a doctor.” I suggested. I would rather this be as private as possible. If was pregnant, there as no way it was Niall's. We had only slept together once, and we used protection. If I was pregnant, it would be my step fathers.
I don't know if it was the thought of being impregnated by Jim or the fact that my stomach had been sour all day, but I threw up. Niall got up and went and got me some water, before calling my doctor to make an appointment.
“They had an opening in an hour...we better head out soon.” Niall knelt down in front of me, putting his hands on my knees. “No matter what we find out today, it's going to be okay. We'll work through this, just like everything else.”
I nodded a bit, putting my hand over his. I didn't say anything. I didn't know what to say. He could say all of these things now, but how would he react when he found out the truth? When he found out I might have a baby that wasn't his? Hell, I didn't even know what I was going to do if I was pregnant.
It would be so different if it was Niall's baby. I could do that. I could have a cute little Irish baby, with blue eyes just like his daddy. I could stay up all hours of the night rocking him and feeding him, or her. I guess it could be a girl. I hoped it was a boy though...if it was Niall's that is. A mini Niall.
“What are you thinking about?” Niall murmured, rubbing my thigh.
I shrugged. “Nothing.”
“I haven't seen you smile that big in months Teagan. That's not nothing.” I was smiling.
“I was just thinking about what it would be like to be a mother.....the mother of your children. Not someone elses...” I trailed off, hoping I didn't hurt him by reminding him if I was pregnant, it wasn't his.
“Oh...” Niall's eyes dropped. I did hurt him. Fuck. “We better get going.” Niall stood up and headed for the door.
The drive to the doctors was silent, so was our wait in the waiting room. Niall went to the room with me, as I explained to the doctor that I needed a pregnancy test. It wasn't my normal physician, so of course she automatically assumed it was Niall's. He didn't say anything about it. I could tell he was hurting.
The doctor told me what to do and then sent us on our way. Telling us she'd call us with the results within a few hours. I don't know how I was going to survive those few hours. I didn't know how I was going to survive a pregnancy.
Niall and I were laying in bed, waiting for my phone to ring. Neither one of us spoke. “Niall?” I broke the silence.
“Hm?” He kept his eyes on the ceiling.
“Do you want kids...?” I hoped my question didn't hurt him even more, knowing I wasn't carrying his baby.
Niall stayed quiet for awhile, before turning his head and looking at me. “I want it all. I want to get married and have kids and have a proper life. I thought it wouldn't be until later in life, but if it's going to happen right now then so be it. If it's with you, I want it. All of it.”
“But it's not-” I was cut off by my phone ringing.
I am in an absolute shit mood, so if this sucks, I'm sorry. I just didn't want to keep you all waiting.
Keep throwing your predictions at me, I love reading them!
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